No Regrets
by Ari's World
Summary: Raven knew him before he become humanities strongest. She had seen him at his weakest point and her heart went out to him for the pain he was going though, but they had a job to do. There was a time for mourning and it wasn't now, they could mourn when the titan's were defeated.
1. The Start

**Hello lovely readers!**

 **So I've been having some writer's block lately and someone gave me some advice to step away and try something else, then go back to the original story and try again. So I've come up with this short story. I really do like AOT and I've recently discovered the OVA's. When I watched No Regrets, this popped in my mind. So I hope you enjoy it!**

 **Forever and Always,**

 **Ari.**

* * *

"Why do we have to find this punk?" Raven groaned pouting at the thought of going underground. She had lived there so long ago and she didn't want to go back.

"Punks," Mike corrected, sniffing the girl next to Raven. "More than one."

"Fine. Why do we have to find these punks," Raven amended, rubbing her hands together. "Erwin, wanna go over the plan again?"

"Just follow him, try to catch Levi off guard. Don't lose him," Erwin said gesturing for her to get going.

Raven sighed, pulling her hood up heading down to the underground. She hated the underground with a passion, to many bad memories had happened there. Yet there she was because her Captain was asking her too.

 _Suck it up Raven. Get the job done._

-.-

"Target found. Engage," Erwin ordered while the four of us used the gear to follow the target. "Raven stay on him." She nodded following after him.

Raven didn't want to admit it out loud, but she was impressed. The three fugitives were doing surprisingly well, when they were up in the air. So much better than the people she trained with.

Raven sighed, when she had to adjust her course because of the military police getting tangled in midair. _Amatures._

The red haired girl and the blond haired man changed their courses. Raven growled when the black haired fugitive when in the building, forcing her to go around. She smirked when he came out of the building, only for her smirk to drop when he saw her adjusting her course. Erwin came from in front of him, missing when the man once again adjusted his course. _Please Mike, bring this guy down._

Raven stayed back a few meters behind him, waiting for Mike to make his attack. She could help but grin, when Mike plowed through the bridge knocking the man off guard. "Raven, let us handle the hand to hand." Raven bit her tongue nodding, listening to her Captain. _I can fight him. I could probably beat the punk._

Raven saw Mike and offered him his fallen blade. She ventured behind Mike, watching Erwin and the fugitive in close combat. "Stop it. Take a look around you." Erwin said calmly, while the man had a look of shock on his face.

Raven glanced at her comrades, seeing them holding the other two fugitives. The red haired girl was kicking and screaming. "Let me go… you bastard." Lavender looked as if she wanted to knock the girl out. Raven looked over the blond male, seeing a pissed of look on his face. "Damn it all!"

"Levi!" The blond asked in shock. _They didn't think they would have got caught._ Raven watched as he let go of the knife in his hand. _They meant something to him._

"You're quick at reading the situation." Erwin commented, while the man glared. "Put them in handcuffs and remove their gear."

Raven ventured over to the red haired girl, going to help Lavander with the troubled girl. "Don't touch me." Raven smirked, taking off her gear. She moved over to the blond man, keeping a blank face while he stared down at her.

"Bring them to their knees," Erwin gestured to the space in front of him on the semi empty street. Raven got ahold of the red haired girl, bringing her to kneel on the ground. "I'll ask a few questions. Where did you get this?"

Raven stood to the left of the dark haired man, watching him glare at the floor refusing to answer.

Erwin went on, "You guys are skilled with the 3D maneuver gear. Who taught you all that?" Ewin's patience was running thin, from what Raven could tell. Erwin walked closer to the black haired man, "You're their leader, right? Were you trained in the military?"

The man looked up at her captain, glaring hatefully with his grey eyes. Raven watched Mike grab the man by his hair, shoving him into the muddy water. "You!" The girl screamed out trying to move to her leader.

Raven watched as the man twisted his head, a look of disgust placed on his face. He glanced at her, while she blinked trying not to be intimidated by the man. "I'll ask one more time. Where did you learn to use 3D maneuver gear?" The man was huffing as if he were killing us all mentally in his mind.

"Not from anyone! We learnt it by ourselves!" The blond yelled out, watching his friend.

If Erwin was impressed he didn't show it. "Self-taught, you say?" Erwin's eyes hardened, "I don't buy it."

"It's just so we're able to rise even a bit in this dirty garbage place! People who're used to sunlight like you guys won't understand," The blond haired man hissed, lunging forward slightly. Erwin glanced at Raven, knowing her story. She had understood why they had taken the gear. Down here all that mattered was surviving, and trying to find sunlight. She nodded, agreeing with his statement.

"That's enough! Let Bro go! Don't be cocky just because you're soldiers!" The girl glared at all of the soldiers, her eye's focusing on Raven in particular. Mike picked up the black haired man from the dirty puddle, she watched Erwin kneel down in front of him.

"My name is Erwin Smith. And yours is?" Erwin asked while both men had a stare down.

Raven didn't think the man would answer. She tried to hide her shock when the man answered, "Levi."

"Levi. Why don't we make a deal?" Erwin asked while Raven hoped that we weren't making a big mistake.

"A deal," Levi hissed.

"I will let your crimes go unpunished. In return, lend me your strength. Join the Survey Corps." Erwin stated, while the three fugitives had looks of disbelief on their faces.

"And if I refuse?" Levi questioned narrowing his eyes.

"The Military Police will have you. Considering all of your crimes, you and your friends, won't be treated very nicely." Erwin stood up walking away from Levi. "Choose whichever you prefer."

They all stood in silence waiting for the man's answer. "Fine." Levi jerked his face towards Raven, the dirty water splashing against her pants and shirt. Raven grinded her teeth, glaring at the stupid criminal. "I'll join the Survey Corps."

"Lavender, go," Erwin commanded, a look of triumph in his eyes. Raven watched Lavender propel herself to where the other captains were. Raven glanced at Mike, seeing a small child peeking out from behind the corner. She had kept some food in her pocket, just in case she were to run into someone.

"Captain," Raven spoke, while the three fugitives eyed her. Erwin looked at her, while she looked back at the child. He nodded and she inclined her head slightly, heading over to the small whited haired child. Raven had seen from earlier that that particular alley was a dead end. The closer she walked, the girl edged back into the dark alley. "It's alright. I won't harm you." Raven watched the girl edge forward curiously. "Are you hungry?" She dug in her pocket, holding out the food to her. The child snatched the food greedily, inhaling it. Raven stood up knowing there wasn't much she could do for the girl. She turned heading back to where Mike and Erwin were.

"Raven," Dex called when he gestured to the red haired girl. She nodded grabbing the girl's arm, thankful that she wasn't struggling anymore.

-.-

"Attention all!" Raven stood staring straight forward at her superiors, her arms clasped behind her back. "From today, these three will be fighting alongside you all! Introduce yourselves!" The commander shouted.

"The name's Levi," Levi said boredly, while he had his arms crossed.

Raven wanted to laugh at all of the shocked faces on her comrades faces.

"Levi… the first thing you'll need is some goddamn discipline! Next!" The commander had a look of disgust and anger on his face.

The red haired girl stepped up next, smirking proudly. "I'm Isabel Magnolia! Nice ta meetcha!"

Raven tried to keep the grin off her face when the blond sulted, "My name is… Farlan Church."

The commander looked towards Captain Flagon, "Flagon, these three will be assigned to your squad. Look after them."

"M-My squad, sir?" Captain Flagon sounded surprised.

"Are you dissatisfied?" The Commander inquired.

"N-No. But, shouldn't Erwin," Flagon tried to amend, while he glanced at Erwin.

"Erwin is tasked with the soldiers' formation. The new recruits will be your responsibility. Is that understood?" The commander's voice had risen to express his displeasure.

Raven watched Flagon salute, "Yes, sir!"

"Dismissed!" The commander shouted, while we all saluted him. Raven glanced at the recruits, before following Mike and Erwin.

"Captain Flagon, seemed displeased," Raven commented, falling into step beside Mike.

Erwin didn't answer until we were in his office. "It doesn't matter. We must be prepared for whatever they have planned. They did not come willingly," Raven nodded, trying to stifle her yawn.

"We will reconvene tomorrow. Get some rest, eat. Be prepared," Erwin dismissed us, heading over to his desk.

Raven nodded walking over to the door. "Same goes for you Captain. Every leader needs their rest." She looked back over her shoulder seeing Mike still in the same place. Raven opened the door starting to head out.

"Raven," Erwin's voice sounded as she turned to face him. "Tell Flagon I'm looking for him. He should be around the barracks."

Raven gave a sharp nod closing his office. She made her way to the barracks, asking around for the other Captain. She was turned to the barrack where he was leading the fugitives. She sighed out loud, one of the people she couldn't stand was the person she had to talk too. Raven walked briskly over to the barrack, knocking on the door seeing Flagon and the other three.

"What is it?" Flagon asked, glaring at her slightly.

Raven tried to hold in her anger. "Captain Erwin is looking for you." She told him, avoiding looking at the other three.

"Pft… he can't find me himself." Raven raised an eyebrow at Flagon's muttered tone. "Fine. Show them where we eat." Flagon ordered, pushing past her bumping her harshly.

Once he was out of sight, Raven glanced back at the three. She sighed, her plan was to go straight to her room and lay down, but she was ordered to do Flagon's job otherwise. She looked to her left touching underneath the wood, grimacing at the grime on her fingers.

"After I show you where to eat. Would you like some cleaning supplies or do you not mind the grime," She twitched her hands, feeling the need to shower. She had came from filth and if she could help it she wouldn't go back to it.

"The cleaning supplies would be nice," Raven looked up, seeing it was the blond that spoke.

Raven nodded, walking out of the barrack, not checking to see if they would follow. If they didn't that was on them, not her.

"Making new friends Raven," She rolled her eyes hearing Beo's annoying voice. "They suit you… didn't you come from-" His voice cut off when he was shoved roughly by her close friend Benson. She turned to see the three actually following her.

"I wouldn't finish that sentence Beo," Benson hissed stepping forward threatenly.

"Enough." Raven called smirking. "I can fight my own battles. Just wait Beo, tomorrow you'll eat your words. You forget we have hand to hand tomorrow." She turned on her heel, walking towards where they served the food. "You eat here," Raven gestured for them to walk in. She raised an eyebrow when they stared at her. "Well you know where to find it. The cleaning supplies are two barracks over. Anything else you may have questions about?"

None of them said anything, so she nodded and headed into the barrack deciding to eat, before she would sleep.

-.-

"Must you always try and fight my battles?" Raven complained when Benson sat across from her. "I am not some scared girl who needs to be protected."

"I don't allow my friends to be treated as filth," Benson grumbled, pushing his brown hair from his eyes.

"You need to cut your hair…" Raven trailed off seeing the three new Corp members walking in, gaining everyone's attention. Raven drained the last of her soup, rubbing her eyes. "I dislike your captain…"

"I dislike yours, he keeps to many secrets." Benson yawned, sipping his coffee. "You're going to end up getting killed Raven."

She rolled her cold blue eyes. "If I die… I die. Least I'm fighting for a good cause."

Raven sat up straighter when Farlan sat next to her and the other two sat across from him. "What are we expecting tomorrow?" The man beside her asked, with his mouthful of vegetables.

"Nothing easy if that's what your hoping for. You will be pushed to the limit. You need to be able to defeat the titans or evade as long as you can," Raven explained, gauging each of their expressions.

"Sounds easy… right bro?" Isabel nudged Levi sounding upbeat.

"Tch…" Benson stood up, shoving his tray towards her. "Rookies." Raven watched as he walked away angry.

Raven grabbed his tray setting it under her's. "Don't be fooled by them. The moment you underestimate them is the moment you fail." She stood with the trays, her eyes hard. She had lost many friends because of the titans. All that was left was Benson, Hanji, Dex and herself.

-.-

 **Levi's P.O.V**

He watched the dark haired girl gain a hard look, as she gathered her trays. "Don't be fooled by them. The moment you underestimate them is the moment you fail." She stood up, leaving the table.

 _She was there when they got you._ He remembered flicking the grimy water at her and the flash of hatred in her cold blue eyes.

"It's not wise to piss Raven off," A male voice said from the table over. He glanced over the light brown haired male. "Don't mess with anyone on Captain Erwin's squad."

"Why," Farlan asked seemingly interested in the girl.

"She's ruthless. Cold. Intelligent. Captain Erwin hand picked her and the others," The man continued. They have more titan kills than any other squad."

Levi had finished his meal, standing up with Farlan and Isabel close behind. Once they were far enough away from the others he muttered. "The others might present as a problem."

"We will find a way Levi," Farlan but his hand on Levi's shoulder.

"Yeah Bro! Nothing to worry about!" Isabel wrapped her arms around his arm clinging to him.

-.-

 **Raven's P.O.V**

She woke up, before any of the other girls. Well besides Hanji, it seemed the crazy girl never slept. Raven got dressed, heading towards the training field. Seeing Mike and Benson already there.

"Before we train Erwin said to meet him in his office," Mike cut in. Raven nodded falling into step beside him, nodding good morning to Benson.

"I don't trust them," Raven said after a while.

"Me either...but it isn't our job to focus on them. We must prepare for our expedition outside the wall," Mike knocked on Erwin's door.

"Enter." Erwin sounded upset. She sent one last look to Mike, before they went in.

-.-

"Do you understand?" Erwin asked looking down at his paperwork.

"Yes Captain," Raven said, saluting him.

"Good. You are dismissed," Erwin stated, while she left the room.

Raven headed back to the training ground, seeing Flagon and his squad. She yelled out when her legs were knocked from under her. She landed on the ground, her breath knocked out of her. Raven looked up seeing Beo and his smirking face. She tried to regain her lost breath, but it was knocked away yet again when he kicked her.

Raven used what strength she had, sweeping her leg out catching him off guard. Beo fell beside her, while she took the opportunity take the upper hand. Raven landed four good punches before she was roughly removed by arms. She shoved the hands away, smoothing out her rumpled clothes.

"Why are you here Raven," Flagon asked, coming into my line of sight.

"I didn't know the training ground was only for one squad," Raven quipped looking down at the dirt and grime on herself. She wanted to smirk, seeing Flagon at a loss for words. Raven glanced at Beo, seeing him glare at her. She smirked at his busted lip and his bleeding nose.

"Show some respect for your captain," Beo hissed, stepping towards her.

"He isn't my Captain," Raven replied, turning away from him. "You're a coward Beo. You didn't think you could take me unsuspecting and still win."

"Enough. I am one of your superiors and-" Flagon stopped short, looking somewhere behind Raven. "Erwin."

"Flagon…" Raven tensed hearing Erwin's voice. "Raven we will talk about this later." Raven turned to Erwin saluting him. He nodded, while she turned away from the training grounds. Her icy blue eyes connected with calculating steel eyes.

-.-

"It wasn't my fault Benson…" Raven grumbled picking at the grass beside her. "You know what never mind. I can't have this plaguing my thoughts. We have an expedition tomorrow."

"It doesn't matter. He was your Captain once," Benson countered bumping her slightly.

" _Was._ Not any more. He's upset because he lost a soldier to Captain Erwin. I don't want to talk about this Benson…" Raven growled, glancing at the former fugitives. "Be careful tomorrow, especially with them."

"What you don't trust them?" Benson commented offering her half of a bread.

She took it, biting into it. "No I don't."

"Have you ever thought about leaving the Corp? You have your citizenship now." Benson asked with his mouthful.

"No…" She answered, seeing Mike beckoning her over. "I'll talk to you later. Thank you for the bread."

"Well done with Beo. You've learned well," Mike commented, while she smirked.

"I've had a good teacher," Raven smiled, looking over at Mike. She owed him everything, he had taught her how to really fight, instead of the basics. He had spent hours with her helping her perfect her movements with the 3D maneuver gear. "Is the Captain upset?"

"No. but you will be punished for talking back to a higher rank." Mike smirked gesturing to the pile of dirty dishes. "You'll be helping the Rookies."

Raven sighed, accepting her punishment.

-.-

Raven remembered her first expedition, like it was yesterday. She could feel the fear and the anxiety of seeing a titan. She had remembered all of the blood and body parts. The bells on the wall always reminded her of the death she would witness on the outside. She sat on her horse Mineral, stroking his neck trying to sooth his nerves. They had been though many expeditions together and he always was nervous when the bells rang.

Raven glanced at Benson, seeing him close by the three people she didn't trust. _You don't have time to worry about him._

"Open the gate! Today, we take another step forward! Show me the fruits of your training! Show them the strength of humanity!" The commander yelled, while most of the soldier rose their blades. "We will now begin the 23rd expedition beyond the walls! Forward, everyone!"

Raven jerked the reins on her horse, urging him forward into a gallop. During her first expedition, she thought that she wouldn't get tired of the view beyond the walls, but every time she saw the scenery it reminded her of the death that always happened.

"Titan sighted! Ahead and to our right," Raven heard a soldier yelling.

"Two 10- metre class titans are heading toward us from behind," She heard another soldier yell.

"They're too close for us to slip away," The Commander glanced over his shoulder. "Prepare for combat! Equip your 3D maneuver gear!"

Raven stood up on Mineral, propelling herself towards the trees. She followed behind the two men who were in front of the Commander. Raven jerked herself to the right, seeing a titan appear out of nowhere killing one of the men.

Raven shot one of her cables into the titan skin, rushing towards the nape of it's neck. She yelled when her knifes met it's skin, cutting off a chunk, killing the titan.

She jumped back on Mineral, slowing down still seeing the two titans behind her. "No." Erwin commanded from beside her. Raven looked back seeing the former fugitives, heading straight for them.

"They're trying to get themselves killed," Raven said, watching as Levi took down one. _He's going to run out of gas._ She watched the other Titan grab Isabel's leg, starting to feel pity for her but it stopped when the girl chopped off it's finger. She smirked seeing Farlan making the killing blow. "Impressive… but they used to much gas."

"All of the titans have been eliminated!" The commander shouted. "Everyone, regroup!"

Raven followed after Erwin, hearing the three celebrate at their kills. "Indeed." Levi jerked around hearing Erwin's voice. "That was impressive, considering it was your first time." Raven glanced over the titan's seeing the deep cuts. "But you used too much gas. You need to be especially conservative out here."

Farlan started forward, ready to argue but was stopped when Levi held his hand up. "You're expecting me to take priority of my equipment over the lives of my friends." Levi sounded angry.

"You're performing a lot of unnecessary movements. Are you beginning to have doubts?" Erwin asked, his face was hard as stone. Raven watched Levi's expression change slightly not understanding what Erwin knew. "If you are, that'll be the death of you very soon." Raven steered Mineral, away from the three glancing at the titan's again.

She stopped letting Erwin pass her. Raven turned back to the three. "You did well, most rookies freeze at seeing a titan." Raven urged Mineral away from the three, riding beside Erwin. "Are my suspicions correct that the three are untrustworthy?" She placed her hood over her head smelling the rain.

"We shall see," Erwin said urging his horse forward.

-.-

Raven was wet and angry. The rain was making it hard for her to see or even sense danger. She glanced down seeing blood. "Captain!" Erwin glanced back at Raven seeing her looking at the ground. She pulled on the reigns, stopping Mineral. She heard yelling and the groaning of a titan. Erwin nodded, forcing his horse to follow the blood and the sounds.

Raven urged her horse to go faster, seeing limbs and the bodies. She pulled Mineral to a halt, seeing the titan body with cuts all over it. She saw the head a few meters away, a body next to it. She looked around again, horror filling her veins seeing the faces of her old squad. _Where is he?_ Raven jumped down, checking each of the bodies. She cried out, seeing her friend a few feet away from where the titan head was. She felt her legs give out from underneath her. She took deep breaths trying to hold in her grief and hatred. Her very first friend had fallen.

Raven looked up at the grey sky, feeling the rain mix in with the tears. She would allow herself to grieve for a moment. She took a deep breath, wiping her face the rain stopping and the clouds disappearing. Raven willed herself not to feel the grief or the hatred, they were still in titan territory. There was no more mourning for the fallen. She stood silently taking her blades out standing close to Erwin, watching the trees for any signs of movement. She was trying her hardest not to look at the body of her friend.

"So, you're the only survivor." Erwin commented drily, egging the men on. "How pathetic." She turned hearing Levi's grunts of anger. He ran toward Erwin, ready to kill him with the blades.

Her eyes widened when Erwin caught the blade cutting himself. "I'm going to kill you! That's why I'm here!" Levi hissed struggling against Erwin. Raven watched as Erwin yanked a scroll out of his belt throwing it on the ground.

"These documents revealing Labov's crimes are a fake. The real ones have likely reached Daris Zackley by now. Lobov is finished." Erwin explained, while Levi's face turned deadly.

"You knew everything right from the start! You knew we were after you, and yet you-" Mike grabbed Levi as he tried to jump Erwin.

Raven watched the man fall to his knees, crying out. She felt pity for him, he had just lost everything. Raven kneeled in front of Levi, seeing his unfocused eyes. Levi met her eyes, seeing pain in her icy depths. She handed him a piece of cloth, before moving away.

"Don't. You'll regret it. If you begin to regret, you'll dull your future decisions and let others make your choices for you. All that's left for you then is to die. Nobody can foretell the outcome. Each decision you make holds meaning only by affecting your next decision. We're going to continue the Expeditions. I expect you to come with me." She watched Erwin walking away, before getting onto his horse.

Raven looked back at Levi, before going back to her friend and cutting off his emblem. _I'm sorry Benson._ She whistled for Mineral, climbing on the horse's back. Raven urged Mineral forward, avoiding looking at her old squad. "Are we going back?"

"Yes." Erwin looked forward, seeming to not care about the carnage below.

Raven looked back, seeing Levi on his horse slowly following after us. She looked down trying to forget Benson's lifeless brown eyes. _How in the world was she going to tell his mother?_

 _-.-_

Raven sat on the roof, gazing up at the dark sky. She remembered when all she wanted was to be able to see the sky and witness the sun rising. Raven heard a door slam from behind her, she turned seeing Levi. She turned back towards the stars, she missed her family, especially her mother.

Raven tensed when Levi, sat on the roof a few meters away. "You came from the underground." He stated after a while.

She glanced at him, seeing him looking up at the stars. "How do you figure?"

"The first sign was how well you kept up underground, it was almost as if you knew which route to take, then how angry you seemed when I splashed the water at you," He sighed, turning his head to look at me lazily. "Then the idiot that attacked you, gave it away."

She grunted in response, "Yes, I did. I came from filth and I got out of it, so I won't go back to it. Beo… he used to tease me badly, but it all stopped when I had to fight him as a cadet. I always kicked his ass and he hated it."

"You seem loyal to Erwin Smith," Raven froze at Levi's cold tone.

"He took a chance on me, just as he did for you and your friends." Raven retorted, turning to glare at him.

"You said that you got out of the underground, why do you owe him your undying loyalty," Levi scoffed as if he was talking to a child.

Raven dug her nails into her palms. "I did. I worked my ass off, and when I choose the Survey Corps I was placed in a different squad. The squad you were placed in. Erwin chose the best you bastard." Raven tried to contain her anger. "I understand you are upset and mourning because you got bested and your loved ones died, but if you try anything stupid. I won't hesitate to take you down."

He looked at the dark haired girl with a blank expression. "You lost someone today."

Raven bit her tongue as the sudden waves of mourning she held at bay, came crashing down. She let out a shuddering breath, "I lost them all." She blinked back the tears, not letting them fall. "There's no time for mourning on the battlefield, you can mourn when we defeat the titans," Raven whispered to herself, breathing deeply.

"Raven," She looked back seeing Mike standing there. She watched him take a deep breath, looking in Levi's direction. "He's apart of our squad."

Raven glanced at Levi smirking slightly. "Hopefully he'll survive…"

* * *

 **So did ya like it? Anywho, let me know what you think! I love love love getting feedback!**

 **Ari.**


	2. Friendship? or Companionship?

**_Hello! I totally forgot that I posted this on here, I've been updating on Quotev. But here are the rest of the chapters!_**

 ** _Forever and Always,_**

 ** _Ari._**

 _ **Chapter 2**_

Raven glanced at Levi reminiscing at her memories of him. At first she disliked the fact she had to be around him, but now she prefered that they were on the same squad. They had come along way since they had met. He had become one of her most trusted friends, no matter how angry she became when he called her brat.

"Tch, what are you looking at brat," Levi drawled, looking up from his paper work.

Raven rolled her eyes going back to her own paperwork. "Nothing interesting."She smirked when he rolled his eyes. "So I've been thinking, that I'd ask Erwin if I could help train some of the rookies." Levi continued on with his work, seeming to not pay attention. She sighed going back to her last of the paper work, finishing up a few things. She had sorted all of the paperwork into one neat pile, setting it on his desk. Briefly Raven had thought about handing him a messy pile, but she thought against it. "You know where to find me if you need me _Captain."_

Raven turned aggravated, she knew he hated it when she called him Captain. She thought that she would be kind and let him know, but he couldn't give her a single moment. She closed the door, leaning against the wall.

"Raven!" She looked up seeing Hanji and Mike. She yawned, nodding her head in acknowledgement. "Are you ready for the expedition tomorrow?" Hanji had leaned against the wall beside her.

"As ready as I can be," Raven yawned again. She had stayed up last night with Levi, going over the information of the expedition.

"You look horrible," Hanji commented, peering closely at her.

Raven placed her hand on Hanji's face, pushing her back slightly. "Hanji we talked about personal space… you can do that to Levi, but not me."

"Speaking of Levi, is he in there," Mike asked frowning slightly.

"Yes," Raven nodded, rubbing her eyes.

"Before you go to pass out, we have more paperwork," Raven glared at Hanji and the stack of paper in Mike's hand. How she didn't realize that he held it before, she didn't know.

Raven glared at the stack of paper. She knew that she would feel bad, if she left it all to Levi. She held her hand out for it, taking it back into Levi's office. Leaving the two outside. "Can't knock brat?"

Raven huffed, sitting back down on the couch bringing the paperwork closer to her. It would take her two hours at least, to finish everything. "You wanna do this shit by yourself?" She snapped, starting to read the report.

"What is it?" Levi asked, while she heard the chair scraping against the floor.

She ran her fingers through her hair. She needed to cut it before they went on the expedition, but it seemed like there wasn't anytime if she wanted sleep. "More paperwork." Raven looked up seeing Levi leaning against his desk. "I know you're keen on your paper work but will you allow the paperwork to be finished-"

"You need to cut your hair, or are you going to risk it getting in your face?" He had cut me off. She glared at him, "are you offering?"

He shrugged, glancing down at the paperwork. "I'll do it while you finish up."

Raven sat back debating, whether or not to let him. She hated cutting her hair, sometimes it came out choppy. "I don't want it short...please."

Levi huffed going to one of his drawers. Raven was putting her faith in him not to cut her hair to short. It was the only thing that made her feel feminine. After all the titan blood she had shed she felt as if she was losing her femininity and her long hair had made her feel like a women. Even as small of a thought it was it had made her feel better. She closed her eyes trying to calm her thoughts, before she focused back on the paperwork.

-.-

"Done," Levi muttered while she continued on with the paperwork. "Tch all of this hair littering the floor."

"I'll clean it, I have a few more papers to read over." Raven ran her fingers through her hair. It probably reached to the middle of her back. "Thanks Levi."

He didn't respond, he only grabbed the rest of the papers from her hands. "Clean the hair up."

Raven got up, rushing to the supply closet to get the broom. She came back, sweeping up the hair. Raven's head felt lighter and she still had semi-long hair. "Tch, you call that clean?"

"Clean it to your standard then and I'll finish the paperwork." Raven offered the broom to him.

She knew that he would cave, she only had to wait out his glare. Raven held in the smirk, when he pushed himself away from his desk grabbing the broom from her.

It's not that she hated cleaning, it was that her clean wasn't good enough to Levi. Yeah, she had came from the underground, but she wasn't as bad as Levi when it came to cleanliness in the room.

She sat in his chair, looking down at the paperwork. She only had about four more pages to read and sign, then she could go eat then lay down."Did you eat yet?"

Raven didn't bother looking up. "No, I'm going to go after I finish up." She looked up when she heard the door shut. She rolled her eyes finishing up the paperwork, before getting up and going to eat. Raven wanted nothing more than to just sleep, but her stomach was eating itself and she knew that she wouldn't be able to sleep on an empty stomach. She yawned opening the doors, seeing the rest of Levi's squad sitting around him. _It's your squad too._

When she had first met his hand picked, they were surprised to see her on his squad, somehow she had managed to make a name of herself. Maybe it was because she had worked so close with Erwin, Mike, Hanji and Levi. Sometimes it had fascinated her that she had worked so well with Levi. When it came time for her to rise up and become a captain she asked Erwin if she could be under Levi's command instead. Raven had known in her heart she wasn't leadership material, she was more support than anything.

But of course Levi had told her she was an idiot, for wanting to be under his command instead of becoming a captain.

Raven brushed off the thoughts sitting at one of the empty tables, eating the soup and the bread. She tried not to think of her old friends who had been killed by the titans, but her mind often drifted to them. She wondered if they would still be in the Corps or retired and living among the civilians. Raven had even missed Beo, the man who sometimes irritated her to no end. He, nor any of the others deserved to die. But that was the thing...the world was cruel and fate didn't pass over any of them.

-.-

 **Levi's P.O.V.**

Levi watched Raven take a seat at one of the other tables, eating quietly. Sometimes when they had an expedition the next day, she would drift by herself and gain a far away look in her icy looking eyes. Levi had realized a few years back that she was reminiscing on all of the friends and comrades she had lost, and she was preparing herself for the up and coming bloodshed. He had once thought that her eyes resembled how she was...icy and cold. But he couldn't have been more wrong, she was one of the nicest easy going people that he had met. She had somehow managed to resemble both Farlan and Isabel in some ways and still be a whole different person to him.

Levi remembered when Raven asked Erwin if she could be under his command instead of being a captain. He probably would never understand why it was something that she wanted. Levi had mixed feelings of her being under his command, he as grateful but he was also angry. He knew she was as good as him, and she could use that and help lead many others on the expeditions that they went on but she refused. Instead she followed him, taking his orders just like he had taken her's.

He had refused to acknowledge her when she had called him captain, it had felt erroneous. He didn't see her as the rest of his squad, he saw her as his equal. She had gained his respect for that over the years, just as he had gained her's.

Levi looked at Raven again, only to see that someone had joined her. He recognised the blond haired male that always seemed to pop up beside her. Piotr, he was in Eld's cadet corps, Levi had considered him to be under his command but it had dropped once he had discovered Eld. Piotr was a part of Hanji's squad. Levi held his cup to his lips covering the smirk when he heard her shut down Piotr advances.

Levi didn't like when men eyed Raven, they acted as if she was a piece of meat. It angered him when they tried to treat her as if they were a higher rank than she, he knew that she would take care of herself, but it angered him nevertheless. He didn't bother to look at her when she stood at the end of the table, wishing everyone a good night before turning to leave the room.

He looked at the rest of his squad sitting around, mulling over their information about tomorrow. "Get some sleep. Be ready tomorrow." Levi stood nodding to each of them. He knew they would be prepared, it was why he had choose them. He left the room, catching a glimpse of Raven walking to her room.


	3. Outside the Wall

_**Chapter 3**_

 **Raven's P.O.V.**

She got up before the sun had risen, she had found herself unable to sleep. She saw Petra still passed out, her hair plastered everywhere and her mouth slightly open. Raven smiled slightly, she had grown to like the girl, Petra reminded her of Lavender. Raven grabbed her things heading to the washroom. She looked in the cracked mirror, seeing purple circles underneath her eyes. She gripped the sink, trying to calm her racing mind. Every expedition that she had been on had started off the same, with her standing in front of the mirror trying to calm herself down. Doing this may have provided her a sense of familiarity, but she never knew if this would be her last mission.

Raven turned away from the mirror, focusing on dressing. Once she was finished, she turned back avoiding looking in the mirror at her eyes. She washed her face, trying to wash away the feelings of today. She needed to be prepared, she was a soldier and people were counting on her. She stood straight glaring at the mirror, pushing the thoughts away. Raven ran her fingers through her hair, Levi had done a good job. She fixed her hair, tying some stands away from her face.

Once she was finished, she headed out seeing Petra still asleep. After all of her years of being in the corps she couldn't sleep in, she envied Petra in that sense. When she was younger and still underground, she cherished the extra moments while she laid in bed. Her sisters would get up early and they would leave her alone in the room they all shared, and she would dream that she was above ground with the sun on her face.

Raven headed towards the stables, making sure Mineral was covered for today. Her poor horse had witnessed just as much as she had. He was a loyal companion, he always came back for her if she had to switch to her 3D gear. Raven stopped outside of his stable seeing him eating some hay. His head came up and he walked over to her, she reached up to pet his nose. "My noble Mineral, are you ready for today? Did you get enough sleep? Drink enough water?" He swished his tail, moving his head a bit. "I'll come for you soon, be ready." Raven patted his nose one last time, seeing the sun rising.

"Can't sleep?" Raven looked up seeing Piotr. He was smirking slightly with two cups, he offered one to her.

"What is it," She reached out to grab the cup, sniffing it.

"Coffee," Piotr downed the rest of his cup. "So I never did get to ask you why you cut your hair."

Raven refrained from rolling her eyes. Piotr seemed to be almost everywhere she went asking her questions, trying to hit on her. At first she was flattered, it had been awhile since a man had taken an interest in her. But now it was getting tiresome turning him down time and time again.

"We have an expedition today," Raven replied simply, taking a small sip of the liquid. She had never been a fan of coffee, but it worked wonders when she needed to stay up and work on paperwork. "I can't risk getting caught or having anything distorting my view."

"Shame…" He muttered leaning against the wall. "Your hair was beautiful."

She gritted her teeth, releasing a deep breath. _How dare he._ She handed him the cup of coffee, moving away from him. "I just remembered, I have something that I need to prep."

"Can't you finish the coffee first before you go?" He called while she rushed to Levi's office. He should still be in his room by now and his office should be empty. She threw open the door, closing it quickly leaning against it.

"Can't knock brat?" Levi's voice came from behind her. She turned seeing him in his chair drinking tea.

Raven sat down on the couch, reclining to look at the slightly orange sky. "Sorry Levi." She wanted to ask why he was up so early but she refrained.

"Why are you in here?" He asked, offering her a cup of tea. She sat up, taking it gingerly from the bottom. The heat from the bottom not bothering her at all.

"I needed a quiet place," She replied with a slight shrug. _More like a place where Piotr wouldn't try to talk to her._

"Tch, you seemed to be hiding from someone," She raised an eyebrow at him. "With the way you came in." Raven bit her lip, she had never complained of this sort of thing to Levi. The last thing she wanted was for him to think of her as incapable and weak. "So what were you hiding from?"

"Does it matter," Raven asked, sipping the tea. It was chamomile with a hint of lavender and it was known to calm nerves.

"If your in here to escape it does," He set his cup down leaning on his hands, looking bored.

Raven downed the rest of her tea, still conflicted on whether or not to tell Levi. "I left Piotr trying to get some peace."

"And you came here?" He asked drinking the rest of his own tea.

"I thought you would still be asleep." She looked at him, seeing the circles underneath his eyes. "But you didn't sleep did you?" Raven frowned at him, they were going outside the walls in a few of hours.

He raised an eyebrow at her, "Stop worrying brat." He offered her more tea, but she refused. "I did sleep."

"You're a terrible liar… almost as bad as Hanji," Raven smirked trying to get of the topic of herself.

"Comparing me to shitty glasses so early in the morning," Levi sent a glare towards her. "Your hair looks better, but it's still long."

Raven smiled slightly, "It will go up before we depart. It won't matter if it's still long if it's up." She ran her fingers through it. Raven stood up, setting her finished up on the tray. Not thinking about why he had two cups. "I should wake Petra, thank you for the tea." She reached for the door handle, "Sorry if I disturbed your peace." Raven opened the door, heading towards her room to wake the younger girl.

-.-

Raven sat on top of Mineral, not looking into the crowd. She didn't bother looking at the older people who could never grasp what they did. She tried not to smile at the comments thrown Levi's way.

"Awh shut up…" Levi grumbled, while he looked forward boredly.

Raven knew that if she came back, she would hear different comments than the ones she was hearing.

"That envy in everyone's eyes will probably go away once they learn you're a clean freak," Hanji couldn't resist teasing him.

"No it would go away because of his regular talks about bowel movements," Raven laughed, making Hanji smile and Levi turning and giving her his angry blank stare.

"Titans are out there. I wonder what kind we'll meet this time! Wouldn't it be awesome if we came across a unique variant?" Hanji was giggling on top of her horse.

Raven glanced at Mike beside her rolling her eyes. She couldn't understand Hanji's love for titans. Maybe if she never seen a titan she would have been interested in Hanji's fascination, but she saw the carnage they were capable of and she couldn't help but hate them.

"There's one of those right here," Levi announced while Hanji started freaking out at the thought of seeing a Titan.

"Huh? Where?!" Raven watched Levi put his hands in Hanji's hair, pulling her close to him. Raven didn't think that Hanji bathed last night, since she could see the oil in her hair. She knew that Levi would complain later about the dirtiness he had gotten from her hair.

"Right here." Levi gave her a bored look.

"Forward!" Raven heard Erwin shout. She sat up straighter urging Mineral to follow Levi's horse.

-.-

Raven looked around her seeing the blood of her comrades. She turned seeing a Titan with a soldier in it's mouth. She followed after Levi, stopping on the building beside the Titan, when Levi had already killed it. She didn't have time to tend to the soldier below them, she looked at Petra who landed beside her. "He might have you tend to the men below."

She looked at the two titans to the left and one huge titan to the right. "Raven!"

Raven looked at Levi, seeing him look over to the one to the left. She nodded going towards it, leaving him to deal with the two on the left. She neared the titan, stopping on the roof behind it. Raven shot her cable into the titan's neck twirling slicing a big chunk of skin out it's neck. She tried not to notice the hot titan blood that had gotten onto her face and hands.

She landed on the roof, watching the others on her squad look at her. She stumbled back when a hand landed on the roof next to her. She turned seeing another titan, that had been behind the titan she had just killed. "Raven!" She had heard a shout from behind her.

"Nice try! Now it's my turn!" Hanji came out of nowhere slicing the titan's neck.

Raven nodded her thanks to Hanji, shooting her cables out toward Eld and Gunther. "I thought you were done for!" Eld bumped her shoulder slightly. She shrugged, it seemed that for now luck was on her side.

"Where is Petra?" Raven looked to where the other two titan's were. "Levi went alone?" Raven saw the two nod. "I'm going to help Petra." She jumped off the building heading towards Petra. She dropped a few meters from Petra and two soldiers she couldn't see. Petra's hands were pushed into the wound. Raven ventured closer, seeing Piotr's bloody body. His wounds were severe and Raven knew he wouldn't make it.

"Raven I need your help" Raven kneeled by Petra taking over allowing Petra to go and tend to the other soldier.

"Ra-" Piotr tried to speak, but he started a coughing fit.

Raven shook her head at him. "Save your strength, don't speak." Raven couldn't help her throat from trying to close up. She bit her cheek, no matter how many soldiers she had been with before their death it never got easier. She knew she could provide some comfort, she ran her fingers through his soft hair.

"It cammee out… of.. nowhere." Piotr put his hands over her's. Raven nodded listening to him. Piotr swallowed hard, putting his hand on her bicep. "Am I going to die?"

Raven took her hand from his hair, taking his hand in her's. "Yes." Piotr's brown eyes had fear in them. She held his hand tighter. "But you aren't alone, I am here with you."

"You…'re the most...beautiful thing… I have… ever seen," Raven tried to give him a smile, but it felt more as a sad grimace. "Captain… Levi…" Raven looked up seeing Levi standing beside him.

Levi squatted down, looking over at her. His eye's were asking if he would make it. Raven shook her head feeling Piotr's hand go limp. She looked down at him, seeing his unseeing brown eyes, looking up at her. Raven let his hand go, watching it fall limp to the ground. She leaned forward closing his eyes, setting his hand on his chest. Levi offered her his blade and his extra handkerchief, she took the blade quickly cutting off his emblem, then she wiped the blood off of the handle and her hands.

"Thank you Levi," Raven handed him his blade back.

"Levi!" Raven turned seeing Erwin on horseback. "We're pulling back!"

"Pulling back? But we haven't advanced as far as we can go." Levi looked at Erwin. Raven felt angered if they pulled back, then all of death will have been for nothing. "You're going to let my men die in vain?"

"The titans have begun heading north as a group." Erwin explained, while she felt dread fill her body. The last time something like this had happened, the wall had been destroyed and most of her family had been killed. "It's a repeat of five years ago. Something's wrong in town. The wall may have been destroyed." Raven looked to Levi, waiting for him to give his command. "We are pulling back now. Get your horses."

Levi nodded glancing at both of the fallen men. "Petra gather the others." Raven watched as Petra nodded leaving to find the others. "What of the dead?"

"We leave them." Raven knew that Erwin's mind was on the living not the dead. It was still hard to leave them to become titan food. Raven clutched the emblem in her palm, "If the wall has been destroyed, they will need us. We don't have time to collect all of the dead." Raven watched Erwin, turn on his horse, galloping away.

Raven turned to Levi, "We need to get our horses."

He glanced at her, nodding. Raven looked at Piotr one last time, before shooting her cables out and rising to the roof.

-.-

Titan's were trying to enter the wall. There was something blocking the cracked entrance. "Levi, we can't enter from where we left. We have to switch to 3D, to get over the wall." Raven's horse matched Levi's so she was right next to him.

"Petra, Gunther take the horses. The rest of us will go up the wall," Levi said, shooting his cables into the wall. Raven shot her own cables towards the wall, propelling herself upward. She stopped at the edge looking down at the carnage. Below her there were two boys and a girl, and two titan's were coming from behind them.

"I'll take the left," Raven darted forward only to be stopped by Levi.

"No, get those two. I'll handle the titans," Levi shot forward, while she dropped down towards the boys.

She landed on the dead titan body, seeing the blond haired body holding up the dark haired boy. She came forward standing next to the girl, who eyed her wearily. "Does he need medical attention?" Raven asked causing the blond boy to jump and turn to face her.

Raven watched the two titan's fall dead and Levi land on them. He wanted to make an entrance, Raven realized since the three kids had their eyes on him. "Hey… you kids! What the hell happened here?"

The three looked up at Levi in awh, before the boy slumped forward. "Eren!" The girl rushed forward, helping the blond hold him up. Raven eyed the boy Eren, seeing red marks covering parts of his face and body. Raven ignored the weary looks from the two, when she touched his head noticing how high his body temperature was.

"Levi!" Raven called while he jumped down. "They boy needs medical attention." She eyed his torn clothes, trying to figure out how they had gotten that way.

"What the hell is on his face?" Levi looked at him in disgust. Raven shrugged, touching the red marks. "Don't touch it."

Raven looked around seeing the other soldiers come forward. "Quick we need to take him into custody."

"Raven let the garrison soldiers deal with it. We have other things to take care of," Levi said, while she stepped back. She noticed Erwin and Mike towards the top of wall rose.

"Levi his temperature on his body felt like the blood of a Titan," Raven murmured quietly, as she watched the Garrison soldiers haul the boy away.

Levi didn't acknowledge what she said, he only gestured for them to meet with Erwin. She shot up her cables, meeting with Erwin and the others on top of Wall Rose. "What did you get from the boy that was taken by the Garrison soldiers?"

Raven looked at Erwin, "His clothes and his equipment was destroyed. He seemed very exhausted, and I had the opportunity to examine him for a minute. His skin was hotter than ours, it felt as if he was submerged in titan blood. There were red marks across his face on the right side and parts of his body. They didn't seem like a skin disease, only as if something was attached to him then suddenly ripped away, leaving behind temporary deep red lines."

"Reports from one of the captain suggest that he turned into a titan, plugging the hole in the wall." Raven looked at Mike.

"The boy Eren… turned into a titan? How is that possible," Raven asked looking down where the three titan bodies were dissipating.

"They don't know. But he is going to be turned over to the military police, they'll decide what to do with him," Mike shrugged looking at Trost district semi destroyed. Raven could see titan's roaming around.

"Levi, you will come with me. We are going to see if we can meet this so called titan shifter. Mike, Hanji, Raven, and the other squad leaders will help the garrison take out the remaining titans. Most will head towards the wall, you take out the remaining few." Erwin commanded while we all nodded.

Hanji and Mike dived off the wall, while Raven glanced at Levi, before shooting her cables out towards the roof. She flipped, following after Mike and Hanji. They stopped a few feet away from a variant, that held a dead girl in it's hand.

"We should try and capture a titan," Hanji looked at the black haired titan excitedly.

Raven rolled her eyes, shooting her cable in the shoulder of the titan, going full speed towards it. She swung behind it, coming back down slashing the skin on the neck. She released the cable, flipping onto the adjacent rooftop.

"Guess you'll have to find another one!" Raven called glaring down at the Titan. Hanji smirked at her, putting her hands on her hips.

"How about the one behind you," Hanji asked while Raven watched the tall shadow behind her. Raven turned, throwing her blade at it's eye, before jumping on it's descending hand and running up towards it's neck, driving her blade it's neck.

"Nope fraid' that ones is done for!" Raven called getting a new blade. Raven turned seeing a titan with a screaming soldier in its grasp. She shot her cables toward the building behind it, flying at full speed slashing the titan's neck. It released the soldier, as it fell. The soldier flew right into Raven, throwing her into the nearby building.

Raven cried out, falling towards the ground. She hit the ground hard, feeling her breath leave her. She tried to push herself up, but her arms wouldn't hold up her weight. She turned to lay on her back, trying to catch her breath. Raven started freaking out when she felt the ground trembling. She sat up, clutching her stomach. Raven looked down at her gear, seeing it broken. A titan appeared at the end of the street, coming straight for her. Raven knew that she couldn't escape it on foot and her gear was broken. Her heart was screaming at her to give up, but her brain refused to let her think like that. She gabbed the blades in her hands clutching them for dear life. The closer the titan came, the more her heart dropped. _Is this what Benson felt? The dread and the fear._

Raven started breathing hard, when the titan grasped her tightly in it's hand. She had been near titan's but never like this, this made her feel more fear. It's ugly smile and it's blue eyes stared at her. She could see fabric in it's teeth. Raven looked around seeing the soldier she had saved, staring at her with fear. He was just a kid, someone in the cadet corps. It brought her closer to it's mouth, Raven yelled out, throwing the blades into it's eyes, hoping it would drop her to clutch it's eyes.

Raven felt dread fill her when only one of her blades pierced it's eyes. It didn't squeeze her in pain, it only brought her closer to it's mouth. Raven tried to hold in her scream as she smelt it's breath on her face. _I'm sorry mom._ Raven saw Hanji and Mike a few rooftops over, looking at her in horror. Raven screamed out when she suddenly started free falling towards the ground. She saw the boy she had saved from earlier had cut the titan's hand off. He fell towards her grasping her hand, then shooting his cables out towards the destroyed buildings.

He set Raven down, leaning against the wall, a fearful and determined look on his face. Raven gazed at the boy, wondering how he got his courage. "Are you okay?" She found herself asking him.

"Yeah," His voice came out shaky and unsure.

"Where did you get the courage," Raven asked him, holding her stomach.

The boy froze, looking at her with his green eyes. "You saved me and I repaid you by flying into you and injuring you." He slid down the wall, his eyes flooding with tears. "I saw the dread on your face when only one knife connected with it's eye. I knew I couldn't kill it, but I knew I had help you."

Raven let out a shaky breath. "You did well cadet, you were very brave… I am very thankful for that, what are you going into?"

He wiped his eyes, "Survey Corps… I'm Tomas Toth."

Raven smiled at him. "Raven Atwood. The Survey Corps could use someone like you Tomas, but seeing Titan's is something you would see regularly. Was this your first time witnessing what titan's are capable of?"

"Raven? You're on squad Levi!" Tomas looked at her in awe, before his face dropped. "I injured you, I almost got you killed."

"Focus Tomas. Don't let yourself get mixed into the past. We are still in danger," Raven said, trying to stand. She smiled in relief when she saw Mike come through the hole where they were hidden. He looked at her relieved, "Is it all clear?" He nodded going over to help her. "I can't use my gear, it's broken."

Mike looked at Tomas, "Can you take her to the wall? She needs to receive medical attention."

"Yes sir." Tomas nodded standing straighter.

"It's clear, a squad will help escort you to the wall." Raven glared at Mike, she didn't need a whole squad to help her out.

"Why can't I just get extra equipment and I can lead myself to the medical," Raven argued while Mike ignored her. "Hello!"

"You can take her now," Mike said, looking at Tomas. She wrapped her arm around Tomas, keeping her thoughts to herself.

She saw the rest of her squad outside the building staring at her. "Will you stop looking at me like that," Raven growled, glaring at them. "I'm not dead." She rolled her eyes slightly when they averted their eyes. Tomas made sure that she was fine, before propelling himself towards the walls.


	4. Healing

_**Chapter 4.**_

 _ **Levi's P.O.V.**_

"I've never seen her so… helpless," Levi could hear Mike talking to Hanji.

"I've never felt so helpless," Hanji murmured, putting her head on top of her clasped hands looking grim.

"Who are you two whispering about," Levi grumbled looking around for Raven. Whenever he was with Erwin, Raven usually went with them. "Shitty glasses where is Raven?" Levi looked at Hanji, feeling panic rush through him.

"She's resting in medical," Hanji looked grim. "She had a run in with a titan today." Levi waited for her to continue, growing impatient when she looked at Mike. "She almost died today Levi. Again."

His head snapped towards Hanji when she said again. "What the hell happened?" Levi tried not to let his anger show.

"I don't know what happened the first time. But the second time she was helping a Cadet, and while she killed the Titan the Cadet swung right into her knocking her down. Hanji tried to go to her, but we had Titan's around us. We looked over and she was in the titan's grasp, she threw her blades at it's eyes, but only one made it." Levi watched Mike's face grow hard. "She was about to be eaten and we couldn't reach her. But the cadet she had saved came out of nowhere, cutting the titan's hand off and hauling her to some abandoned building."

Levi's anger was still boiling, he didn't want to lose someone else. "And the first time?"

"When she killed the titan when you taking down the two. There was another one behind it, it was blocked from view. It almost smashed her," Hanji said, while Levi tried not to feel guilty.

He turned away from the two, marching to where she was. He questioned one of the nurses, the older nurse rolling her eyes slightly pointing to her room. He opened the door, seeing her asleep with a few cuts on her face. She was frowning and tossing fitfully. He moved to the bench beside her bed, reaching out to stroke her cheek trying to ease her dreams. She sighed softly, relaxing. Levi sat back, putting his hand on her's.

-.-

He jerked awake, when he felt her grasp his hand. Levi looked down at his friend, he wanted to yell at her but it all went away when she smiled at him. "How long have I been out? Do ya know?"

"Tch I don't know. Are you okay," He found himself brushing her messy bangs away from her eyes.

Raven moved to sit up, while he pushed her back down. "Levi I'm fine. Can I get up now?" She pushed hands away wincing slightly as she sat up.

"What the fuck were you thinking brat?" Levi hissed helping her sit.

"Worried?" Raven smirked, holding her stomach. Levi gave her a blank stare. Raven dropped her smirk, sighing slightly. "I wasn't thinking, I just saw someone who needed my help and I acted."

Levi sighed roughly, running his hands over his face. "I thought you died Raven… do you have any idea how that made me feel brat? Now you're sitting her smirking as if nothing happened."

Raven reached out tentatively touching the top of his hand. "Levi I know what I'm getting myself into, I know what this job entails. I didn't mean for you to worry."

Levi turned his hand so their palms were against each other. He could feel the slight callouses, from where she gripped her blades. He didn't know when his feelings of friendship had changed into something more with her. Levi brushed her bangs back again, running his finger along her cheek brushing against the scar. Raven grabbed his hand, holding it in hers. "How did it go with the boy?

"He's fucking insane, but he has guts. We are going to his court hearing. Erwin has a proposal to get the brat to join us. I told Erwin I would be in charge of the brat." Levi sighed looking down at their hands.

"So he has to join the survey corps?" Raven asked, pulling her hands away reaching up to stretch, wincing clutching her stomach.

"Tch idiot, aren't you listening to me?" Levi sat back, kicking his legs up on her bed. "Maybe the titan really did a number on you. We have to persuade the judge to get him to turn the boy over to us."

Raven kicked his legs off, running her hands through her hair. "I got knocked into a building ass. I was only grabbed by a titan." Raven gave a small wave behind him. "Don't tell me, the nurse gave you the tray."

Levi didn't turn, knowing that it was either Hanji or Mike. "She didn't seem to like you very much…"

Raven shrugged holding her hands out for the tray. "She's upset because I told her not to put her cold, bloody hands on me. She should have washed them, before trying to touch me." Levi watched Raven sip her soup. "Hanji, the boy. Did he make it back to his cadet squad? Do you know?"

"I'm sorry, I don't. Well we caught two titans," Hanji smiled madly, "I could use your help on this."

Raven held up her hand silencing her. "I don't really want to deal with the science. Just thinking about your lunatic self and you being with the titan's is enough to make my head hurt."

"Maybe because you hit your head that's why it's hurting," Hanji smiled, while Raven threw a glare at her.

"Good night Hanji," Raven growled while setting the tray beside Levi. He watched Hanji take her leave and Raven lean back into the bed.

"Finish eating," Levi grabbed the tray setting it back on her lap standing up. He knew that she was rolling her eyes at him. "Don't make me force feed you."

He heard her huff in annoyance. "Levi, I'm not hungry."

Levi sat on the bed beside her, grabbing hold of the bread. "You will need your energy brat, eat the goddamn bread."

Raven's eyes flashed in defiance, as she took the bread setting it back down on the plate. "No."

Levi felt his eye twitch, stubborn woman. "Levi?" Raven asked after awhile of silence. He looked at her, eating the bread that she refused to eat. Levi watched her, she seemed to be at war with herself.

"Spit it out," Levi said, his patience thin.

He watched her. She looked at him, suddenly looking very small and feeble. It was a different side of her he hardly saw. "Would you mind staying with me, until I fall asleep?"

He nodded, standing up gesturing for her to move over. Raven moved over, laying down sighing softly. He glanced down at her, her hand close to his right thigh. Levi reached his hand down taking hers, holding it trying to provide some sort of comfort. Hell he knew that he wasn't the best at being someone who comforted someone else, Raven usually did that. But he would try to be that for her.

-.-

Levi jolted awake when he felt something drape on top of him. Levi looked at the old nurse who had smiled at him. "What did the doctor say about her injuries?" Levi asked, looking down at Raven sleeping.

"Are you her husband," The grey haired lady raised her eyebrow. Levi shook his head. "Her fiance perhaps?" Levi glared at the women, why did any of this matter?

"I'm her captain. Are you going to answer me or not," Levi growled out pulling his rank, moving away from Raven, trying his hardest not to wake her.

The nurse's smile dimmed. "Few cracked ribs and cuts on her body. I think she needs to take it easy for a few day's."

"When can she be released?" Levi sat on the bench his arms crossed.

"As soon as she wakes up." The nurse murmured leaving the room.

Levi looked back at Raven, who was still asleep. He sat back on the bed, wanting nothing more than to lay down. He returned to where he was before, leaning against the wall behind him. Raven moved closer to him unconsciously, grabbing ahold of his pant leg.

Levi tensed slightly, before putting his hand on her hair trying to figure out when his feeling had morphed into something more than just friendship with her. Levi knew that what he felt, wasn't good in their line of work. If they were in a different place and there wasn't a threat of titan's looming over them, then maybe he would act on whatever he was feeling. But they weren't in a different place, they were here and titan's threatened humanity.

He glanced down at the sleeping girl, somehow she had managed to worm her way into his life and mean something to him.

 _*Flashback*_

 _He was glaring at the girl, she had just told him to run the course again, because he had used to much gas. "This is useless," He refused to run it again, he turned away from her he had better use of his time._

 _The girl grabbed his arm, pulling him with strength he didn't know she had. He faced the girl, her eyes blazing in anger, "No it's not… if you wanna become titan food be my guest. I have better things to do then waste my time with someone who refuses to listen." She shoved his arm away, stomping off. Levi watched the girl push past two people. The man sighed gesturing to him, while he took off after the girl._

" _You seemed to have pissed off Raven, which is very hard to do," The girl with glasses frowned. "What did she tell you?"_

 _Levi glared at her. "Tch, brat wanted me to run the course again. I used to much gas."_

" _If you use too much gas outside the wall, the more likely you will die. She's trying to help prevent that," Levi looked closely seeing her dirty glasses and oily hair. Didn't she bathe?_

 _He saw Raven behind shitty glasses, an angry look plastered on her face. "Back so soon?"_

 _Raven bit her lip, clutching her fists tightly, "Look, since you're on this squad, we need to know that you have our backs. Just so you know, we have your's. I know trust takes time, but I'm asking as your teammate, for you just listen to me. I have been doing this longer than you, and I've managed to stay alive." She sighed roughly running her hands over her face, giving him a grim smile. "Besides I'd rather not witness semi good talent get eaten."_

 _*End of Flashback*_

 _-.-_

 _*Another Flashback*_

 _Levi looked around seeing the dying men around him. He glanced at Raven kneeling beside one of the men, holding his hand running her fingers through his hair soothing him. Levi ventured closer to her listening to what she was saying._

" _Am I going to die," The fallen soldier choked out, while she held his bloody hand tighter._

" _Yes." Raven replied while the soldier trembled. "You aren't alone, Luik."_

" _Have… Did I do… well?" Levi watched Luik's hands clutch her's. "Tell… Maria."_

 _Raven looked up glancing around frowning. Levi stood watch, since they were still in Titan territory. "You did well Luik. What do you want me to tell her?"_

" _I love… her," Luki took in one breath, before his eyes closed and his body relaxed._

 _Raven sighed, letting his hand go. "We need to meet back with the rest of the squad." Levi watched Raven wipe the blood off her hands. "We will leave the dead."_

 _-.-_

" _How do you do it?" Levi asked her while they put away their horses._

" _Do what?" Raven replied, brushing her horse. "Be more specific," She turned raising an eyebrow._

" _How are you so calm when your friends die around you. Don't you have a heart?" Levi snarled, he was a wreck when the people he loved died, yet here she was as calm as can be._

 _Raven sighed, putting her saddle on the wooden bench. "There is a time for mourning, the way I see it is that I can mourn when the Titan's are dead. So yes Levi I do have a heart. Anything else you wanna accuse me of?" Levi clenched his jaw. "You know you aren't the first person to accuse me of not having a heart. The last person that did that, ended up being one of my closest friends. But I won't hold my breath," She turned, heading out of the stables. Levi glared at her back, leaving his own horse. He followed her to where she usually sat along the fountain, Levi let out a silent sigh sitting down beside her. She was irritating but he had wanted to know how she did it. So he sat beside her, neither of them finding the will to talk._

 _They had sat there awhile before he broke the silence. "I don't understand, how you can just be calm when you lose people."_

 _She didn't say anything to him for a few minutes, so he sat there wondering if she was ignoring him or she was just lost in her memories. Levi sighed roughly getting up, and started to walk away. "It's hard.." He stopped listening to her choosing her words carefully. "I miss every person I get close too. Every single one. If I mourn them now Levi, then everything will fall apart and how will I be able to do my part to help destroy the titans? Yes, they see me as cold hearted or the ice queen, but I have to do what helps me. It may not work for others, but it works for me."_

 _He turned not understanding her, "Then why do you choose to get close to people? You choose to put yourself through pain."_

 _Levi noticed her eyes start to water, but she wouldn't let the tears fall. "If I didn't get close to people I would be lonely. I take the chance to let people in because just maybe they will make it. And if they don't then I get to cherish the moments I spent with them." She smiled slightly, looking down at her hands, "You remind me of Benson, ya know."_

 _He leaned beside her, "You remind me of Isabel and Farlan. Tch, it's annoying."_

 _Raven giggled and she shook her head slightly. She sobered up slightly, "I didn't know them at all, but they seemed very loyal and loving towards you."_

" _They were," Levi looked down, pushing his feelings of grief away._

 _Raven got up, brushing the imaginary dirt off herself. "I hope now that you asked me, you'll understand why I do the things I do. And if you need anything Levi, I'm here."_

 _*End of Flashback*_

Levi blinked feeling a warm hand on his arm, he saw Raven's concerned face. "You alright?"

"Fine.. Ready to go brat I have things to do," He stood, watching her smile slightly getting up. Levi looked away when he noticed that she was in her undergarments. "I'll be outside. Hurry it up."

-.-

Raven yawned loudly, losing her balance. Levi reached over steading her slightly, "Watch what you're doing brat."

"Call me brat one more time… I swear old man," Raven glared up at him. "I'll dirty up your office."

"You'll clean it up Raven," Levi mumbled, seeing the rest of his squad sitting around. _Old man?_ "I'm only six years older than you."

"I'll tell Eld to do it…" She grinned at him, he shoved her slightly. "You're still old Levi…"

He glared down at her, not getting a chance to answer her, since the other's decided to join him. Eld slung his arm around her shoulder pulling her into a quick hug. "You may be the luckiest girl alive.. I swear."

Raven patted his shoulder, "It'll run out one day." She started laughing at his angry expression. "Oh don't take it to heart, it's a grim joke Eld."

"Shut up idiot, the rest of you get some rest. Raven we have more paperwork. Just because you decided to get slapped by a titan, doesn't mean you get to slack off in the aspect of paperwork," He commented drily, pulling her along. He walked up the stairs noticing Raven struggling slightly, he trudged towards her slinging her arm around his shoulder taking on most of her weight. "What the fuck have you been eating?"

"Food.. are you saying I'm fat," She hissed, pulling away from him while he gripped her tighter. "Maybe you're weak."

"I'm hauling your ass up the stairs," Levi huffed, while she rolled her eyes.

"Sometimes I wonder why I even like you," Raven tugged on his hair, while she pulled away when they reached his office.

He grinned at her slightly, knowing exactly how to ruffle her feathers. "Et je me demande pourquoi je t'aime (And I wonder why I like you)."

She huffed walking into his office, going to sit on the couch. "One of these day's Levi, I'm going to figure out what the hell you're saying. But today is not that day." She laughed dryly focusing on her hands.

He frowned slightly, kneeling in front of her. "What's wrong brat?" Raven looked up at him, before looking away. "You can tell me Raven."

She looked at him again, reaching out to touch his cheek. Once her warm hand touched his cheek, he leaned into it slightly. "I'm going to take a leap here Levi and it's been bothering me since it happened…" He grasped her other hand, trying to urge her to say more. "I feel so much more for you than just our friendship and it's dangerous in our line of work, but I almost died and I wanted to tell you-"

He leaned forward crashing his lips to her's, pulling her closer. She froze for a second before, her fingers attached themselves to his hair, trying to get impossibly closer. Her lip's were slightly chapped, but he didn't mind. She pulled away to breath, her face flushed slightly as she gazed into his eyes. "You aren't alone in your feelings."

Raven let out a shaky breath, smiling slightly leaning her forehead against his. "I was so scared to tell you, I didn't want to ruin our friendship."

"I understand but we can't let this get anywhere Raven," He put his hand on her cheek, stroking her scar.

She gave him a grim smile. "I know… it's just nice to know." She leaned away from him slightly her bangs shielding her eyes from him. "If we lived in different era, maybe it would be somewhere."

Levi sighed nodding, he held on to her hands giving them both a moment to realish in each other's company.


	5. Judge, Jury or Execution

_**Chapter 5**_

Raven followed after Hanji and Mike, nervous for Eren. If things didn't go they way Erwin planned then Eren would be dissected by the military police.

"Ravennnn.. We have to move faster," Hanji smiled happily, urging her to move quicker.

Raven held in her sigh, picking up her pace, squeezing in between the two. She avoided looking at the Military police, the last thing she wanted was to see was Jozef and if she could help it she was going to avoid him at all costs.

"What do you three want," A gruff male voice asked, while Raven rolled her eyes.

"You know damn well what we want, so stop asking stupid questions," Raven growled out, slamming her hand down on the desk.

The blond haired man stood up, glaring down at her while his two guards moved forward. Hanji stepped in front of Raven waving her hands dramatically. "We are simply here to get the boy."

"Boy?!" The man grunted sitting back down, reclining in his seat. "That's a monster, not a boy."

Raven pushed Hanji to the side, "What would you know of monsters? All you do is sit on your fat a-" Mike reached forward shoving her slightly. Raven clenched her jaw when the blond sent a proud smirk towards the short girl.

"The _monster_ has to wear these," The blond held up a pair of shiny handcuffs, holding them out for Raven to take.

Raven reached forward yanking them into her grasp catching the blond's skin. "Thank you.."

She turned towards where they held Eren, not bothering to wait for Hanji or Mike. She followed the men down the stairs seeing three guards by a certain cell. Hanji pushed past Raven clinging to the bars of the cell like a maniac scaring the boy. "You must be Eren! Are you okay? How're things going?"

Raven looked over the boy seeing chains, constricting him only a small amount of movement. "Huh?"

Hanji smiled her voice full of empathy, "Sorry for the long wait. You can finally come out now." Raven tossed the handcuffs to Hanji ignoring the rest of her conversation with Eren, leaning against the wall trying not to glare at the military police.

It wasn't that she hated them because half of them thought they were better than her, it was that most of them were smart and could actually help during the expeditions but they choose to live there and look down upon those in different military branches. She had worked her ass off to be in the top ten during her time as a cadet, and most the the people in the top ten went to the military police.

She watched them handcuff Eren before shoving him roughly at Mike. "Stop being scared assholes." Raven hissed helping steady Eren. "You okay?"

Eren looked at her with his brilliant teal green eyes, his kind eyes telling her thank you. She walked ahead of them, trying to tell herself that everything was going to work in their favor.

-.-

"I'm Hanji Zoe, a squad leader with the Scout Regiment," She could hear Hanji's loud proud voice. "That's Mike Zacharias also a squad leader." Raven turned slightly to see Mike sniffing the poor guy. Raven smirked slightly when he had done the same thing to her and she had slapped him in the face, managing to give him a red mark. "Yeah, he has a habit of smelling people he meets for the first time.. And then sneering. I don't think that it means anything though. He may not look it, but he has what it takes to be a squad leader. "

"Who's she," Raven heard Eren question, while they were closer to the courtroom.

"The short girl with the icy blue eyes is Raven Atwood, Captain Levi's second in command. She refused to be a Squad Leader, instead she choose to take orders from another shorty," Hanji explained while Raven stopped at the doors. Raven turned meeting Eren's gaze, "Oh sorry. I talk too much. We're already here. But that's okay! It's better if we don't explain."

The two military police guards pushed past Raven, shoving Eren into the courtroom, while he struggled slightly. "Hey! Wait!"

Raven felt pity, looking into Eren's scared eye's while he pleaded with them. Raven wanted to tell him that it was going to be okay, but she couldn't because she didn't know the outcome.

"Maybe I shouldn't say this, but all we can do is put our blind trust in you. I wish you luck!" Hanji slammed the doors shut.

"Hanji, I think you just frightened the boy even more,"Raven commented, walking towards the stairs.

-.-

Raven looked down seeing the full court. She avoid looking at the Military Police that were beside her. She kept her eye's on Eren, willing him to act accordingly so the Corps could have him under their care.

"Yes! I, Nial Dawk, Commander of the Military Police, will explain our proposal. We believe that after a thorough examination of Yeager's body, he should be done away with immediately. Granted, it is a fact that his Titan powers allowed us to fend off this attack.. But his existence is now causing ripples that could lead to internal strife. So, we should at least get as much data as possible out of him before we turn him into a martyr for those who died in battle," Nial glared at the boy in chains.

"That won't be necessary! He is vermin who used trickery to get past the wall given to us by God's great wisdom! We should kill him right now!" Raven tried not to roll her eyes at the Reverend. She couldn't stand him, he preached about the wall and it being God's gift but why would he allow people to be eaten.

"Next, I wish to hear the Scout Regiment's proposal," Darius Zackly leaned forward, looking over at Erwin expectantly.

"Yes, Sir. I, Erwin Smith, 13th commander of the Scout Regiment, will present our proposal. We of the Scout Regiment wish to induct Eren as a full- fledged member and use his Titan powers to reclaim Wall Maria. That is all." Erwin, looked straight ahead, while the men next to Raven scoffed slightly. Mike stepped back, pushing Raven to stand in between him and Hanji.

"Hmm? Is that it?" Darius asked surprised.

"Yes. With his power's we can reclaim Wall Maria. We feel it is clear what our priorities should be," Erwin explained more in depth.

"I see… Might I ask where you would start in order to accomplish this plan? Pixis, wasn't the wall in Trost District completely sealed?" Darius clasped his hands together.

Raven glanced around trying to remember who Pixis was, she settled her eyes on a bald man in a Garrison Regiment jacket. "Yes, that gate will never open or close again."

"We hope to start out from Karanes District to the east, then proceed to Shiganshina District. We will work our way along a new route that we will create from scratch," Erwin said, while Raven held in her anger. Everything that they had worked for had been lost, and all of the deaths had been meaningless.

"Just a minute! This time, shouldn't we seal off every single gate?" A citizen yelled out, below her. "The Colossal Titan is only able to destroy the gate portion! If we reinforce those areas, we won't ever be attacked again!"

"Shut up, you dog of the merchant association!"

Raven ran her fingers through her hair, listening to the men yell back and forth.

"We've had enough of you people playing hero!" Someone shouted out. Raven gripped the ledge trying to pinpoint the voice.

"You sure talk a lot for a fat pig. What guarantee do we have that the Titan's will wait for us while we seal and reinforce the gates? When you say 'we' you're talking about the friends you're protecting so that you can get fat. You pigs don't even notice the people who are struggling to eat because there isn't enough land," Raven looked to Levi, feeling a surge of pride course through her.

The men beneath her were struggling to speak. "We're..simply saying that is the gates are sealed, we'll all be spared."

"Stop it! You sacrilegious scoundrel! You would dare lay human hands on Wall Rose, a gift from god?!" The reverend shoved one of the men. "Look at that divine masterpiece beyond human understanding!"

Raven now understood why her father told her to never get involved with the politics of Military once she joined. Raven scanned the crowed seeing Jozef, her eye's met his own blue ones. She swallowed hard, glancing away from his prying eyes.

Raven looked over to Darius when he started hitting the desk. "Order! You can take personal arguments elsewhere. Yeager, I want to know… Can you, as a soldier, continue to help humankind by using your Titan powers?"

Raven felt her heart speed up when she waited for Eren's response. "Yes, I can!"

"Oh? But this is what's written in the report of the attack on Trost District. 'After turning into a Titan, he swung his fist at Mikasa Ackerman.'" Eren glanced over to left quickly. "Who is Mikasa Ackerman?"

"That would be me." A girl called out wearing a red scarf.

"Is it true that Yeager in Titan form attacked you?" Darius required, while the girl looked conflicted.

"Yes, it's true." Her response sent many murmur's throughout the crowd. "However, two time's prior to that, Eren in Titan form saved my life. The first time, just as I was nearly captured by a Titan, Eren stood in it's way to protect me. The second time, he protected Armin and me from an artillery shell. I would like you to take these facts into consideration."

"Just a minute. Your testimony includes a considerable amount of personal emotions. Mikasa Ackerman lost both of her parents at a tender age and the Yeager family took her in. In addition, our investigation into the events of that time uncovered shocking facts. Eren Yeager and Mikasa Ackerman, both nine years old at the time, stabbed and killed three men who tried to rob and kidnap her. While it may have been justifiable self-defense, this cannot help but cast doubt on his fundamental humanity. Should we entrust him with the fate of humankind and all our resources?" Nial caused more of a distress over then men.

Raven bit her lip slightly, trying not to make contact with Jozef. "This was in the past and in self-defence Mike. They were children, there is no way that they could be Titan children."

"It doesn't matter, we still need to persuade them to let us have him. If we don't then he will be killed," Mike sniffed the air slightly, turning to look at the men beside him.

"Now hold on! I may be a monster, but Mikasa has nothing to do with that!" Eren yelled out, his chains straining against the pole. "She's not involved!" Hanji grasped Raven's shoulder excitedly. All they needed was for Eren to get upset, and the Military Police would fall right into their hands. "It's not true!" Eren banged his chains causing the room to go silent. "No… That's not true… You people.. You're carrying on using whatever excuse is convenient for you. In the first place, you people have never seen a Titan, so what're your so afraid of?" Eren strained himself towards the Military Police. "What's going to happen if people have the power don't fight? If you're afraid to fight to go on living, then at least help me! You.. cowards! Why can't you just shut up and take a chance on me?!"

"Take aim!" Nial yelled, to the man on his right. While Levi jumped over the gate. Raven flinched when Levi sent a well placed kick to Eren's face. She grounded herself watching Levi, send another kick to Eren's ribs. Levi grabbed Eren's hair, bringing his face down to his knee. Raven looked around seeing looks of shock on people's faces. She met Jozef's gaze again seeing the surprise at the attack.

Levi placed his foot on Eren's head, "This is just my personal philosophy… I think pain is the most effective punishment. What you need now can't be taught by words, only by action. You're bent over on your knees which makes you easy to kick." Levi started kicking him again.

"Wait, Levi." Nial stuttered out while Levi glanced at him. "It's dangerous. What if he gets mae and turns into a Titan?"

Levi kicked him once more. "What're you talking about?" Raven tried not to think of the feeling of Levi's fingers in her hair, when he grabbed Eren's. "Weren't you guys going to dissect this guy? I heard this guy in Titan form killed twenty Titans before stopping from exhaustion. If he's an enemy, his intelligence could be troublesome. But then, he's not _my_ enemy. But what about you people? You guys who persecuted him better think about that. Can you really kill this guy?"

Levi glanced up at Raven, while she sent him a half smile. She knew that they had a win.

"Commander-in-Chief, I have a proposal," Erwin raised his hand.

"What is it?"

"There are many unknown elements of Eren's Titan powers, and there will always be hidden dangers. Therefore, I'd like to put Captain Levi in charge of Eren and explore the exterior." Erwin asked, while the room remained silent.

"By taking Eren with you?"

"Yes. We'll find out if Eren can control his Titan powers. And whether or not he is of benefit to humankind. I'd like you to make your decision after our results are in." Erwin asked, while Raven felt her stomach drop. If they didn't do well to control him, then he would go to the Military Police.

"Control Eren Yeager, eh? Can you do it, Levi?" Darius asked, seemingly conflicted.

"If you mean, can I kill him? Certainly. The thing is, though that there are no halfway measures," Levi stated.

"I've made my decision."

-.-

"We have a much bigger task to accomplish," Raven stated, walking down the stairs.

"Raven! Mike! Hanji!" Raven halted slightly seeing Jozef, coming towards them.

Jozef had been in their cadet class and he had been in the top ten, along with them. But her had chosen the Military Police. At one time there had been a budding romance between Raven and him, but it all came to an end once they had chosen where they wanted to be.

Mike and Hanji nodded to him pushing past to get to Erwin and Levi, while Raven stepped around him. "Jozef." She greeted as she passed him.

His hand shot out grasping her arm pulling her to a stop. "Can't spare a moment for an old friend?"

"Raven," Levi called watching the man wearily. "Let's go."

Raven nodded yanking her arm away from him. "Fraid not. Goodbye Jozef." She walked towards Levi only to be grasped again.

"How much longer will you be in the Survey Corps? I can have you traded into the Military Police and it can be just like old times…" Jozef eyed her up and down, smiling slightly. "C'mon Raven you don't deserved to be in the Survey Corps.. You could have-"

Raven stomped on his foot, pulling her arm away from him. "Don't touch me.. I will not be a coward on the sidelines Jozef, now my _captain_ is calling for me."

Raven moved away from him, catching up to where Levi was waiting for her. "Tch, why didn't you just do that in the first place. We don't have time for you to be lagging."

"Then move your ass," Raven growled, walking faster than him to where Eren would be.

-.-

Raven sat on the desk, watching Hanji do first aid on Eren. Usually that was what she did, but Hanji was all too excited to be near Eren.

"Man, that was vicious. It must hurt?" Hanji dabbed the cotton on Eren's cheek.

"A little," Eren whispered, clutching the towel to his face.

"So, how does it hurt?" the science maniac asked, moving closer to Eren.

Raven glanced at Mike, ignoring the conversation. Jozef was Mike's close friend while we were in the cadet corps and Raven has thought that their friendship would last even when they did join different Corps, but it didn't.

-.-

 **Levi's P.O.V**

Levi watched Raven, sit on the desk with her legs dangling. She was avoiding his eye's and she had been ever since they talked a few night's ago. He watched the man from earlier wondering who the hell he was. He had known Mike and Hanji as well, so maybe they were in the Cadet Corps together. He had a Military Police jacket on. It seemed from the way the man eyed Raven, he had taken a liking to her and it shouldn't have bothered Levi as much as it did. He didn't need another thing on his plate, but he wasn't going to let the thought of Raven get away from him either.

Levi gritted his teeth, moving to go sit on the couch. He sat down, throwing his arm behind Eren while Eren flinched violently. "So… Eren."

"Y-Yes," Eren stuttered, out while Raven got off the table, sitting on Eren's right.

"Do you resent me?" Levi asked, liking the look of fear on Eren's face.

"N-No. I realize it was all an act you had to put on." Eren said crossing his arms.

"Good, then." He closed his eyes, feeling tired. It had been a long day and all he wanted to do was lay down.

"You could've held back a bit. He lost a tooth. See," Hanji said holding the tooth up to Levi.

"Don't pick it up. It's disgusting," He commented, wrinkling his nose at the bloody tooth.

"Hanji's right, now Eren might have a hard time eating," Raven chimed in, Levi glanced at her rolling his eyes.

"This is a valuable sample," Hanji explained while Eren's eyes were wide. Levi watched as Raven set her hand on Eren shooting him a comforting smile.

"Eren, wasn't that preferable to getting dissected by these guys," He countered, taking Raven attention away from Eren, only for her to roll her eyes at him.

"I'm not like them. I wouldn't kill Eren." Hanji argued.

"Will you two quit it, he has been through enough today," Raven slapped his hand and kicked Hanji slightly. "Eren are you okay?"

"Don't baby the recruit, save that for your own brats," Levi sent a quick swat back towards her. Raven's face had dropped at his words and he didn't understand why. He glanced away from her, while Hanji asked about Eren's tooth. He leaned closer to Eren and saw that the tooth had been grown back.

"Extraordinary Eren," Erwin commented, pulling back setting his hand on Hanji's shoulder. "Well as of tomorrow, you will be released into our custody officially. But tonight I'm afraid we will stay here and you must stay in the room where they kept you."

"It's not a room Erwin.. It's a cell," Raven muttered getting up and going back to the desk where she was sitting earlier. "We should just take him now Erwin."

"They will release him officially tomorrow morning Raven, until then we will stay here. No more argument's please Raven," Erwin sighed glancing at her while Mike walked over to her bumping her slightly.

"Of course commander," Raven mumbled, crossing her legs glaring at her boots.

-.-

 **Raven's P.O.V.**

"What's your problem idiot? You're acting weird," He commented while Raven turned slightly the frown evident on her face. She huffed remaining quiet. "Raven I don't have time for this."

She turned to send him a nasty glare, "Then leave me the hell alone. I'm fine Levi."

"Bullshit… if you were fine you would be you, not all dark and moody," Levi grabbed her arm stopping them from walking further. "What the hell is wrong with you?"

"Levi..can we talk about this later. Away from the prying eyes," Raven glanced around seeing Military Police turning around the corner. "Levi please."

She watched him give a cold stare towards them, pulling her towards their assigned rooms. "Tch, we are going to settle this now."

Raven yanked her arm away from him, "I can walk on my own, thank you very much." She fell into step beside him, ignoring the looks from the Military Police. "What the hell are you looking at?" She found herself smirking when they both looked away awkwardly.

-.-

She sat on the other bed, watching Levi take his time taking off his hood. She was hungry and tired, all she wanted to do was go into her room and sleep. Once he was finished he sat across from her, staring at her. If she was a newer member and she didn't know Levi she would have struggled under his gaze. But she wasn't a new member, according to most she was a veteran for having survived for so long, so since she had been steeled over time his gaze only made her stare at him blankly, wondering who would crack first.

Raven took the time to study his face, seeing the dark circles under his eyes that were only going to get darker because of the new addition to his team. His hair was slightly longer and her mind flashed back to when she ran her fingers through his soft hair. Raven found herself smiling slightly, still able to cherish the memory of the other night.

"Raven…" Levi had broken the silence first when it was usually Raven who did. "What's wrong?"

She looked away from him, for the first time she didn't want to share something from her past. She watched him move towards her, grasping ahold of her hand and his other hand brushing her cheek. She closed her eyes at the touch of his hand, trying not to think of the bad memories. "I don't want to speak of it Levi. I'm tired and it's too tiring to talk about."

"Well suck it up." Raven's eyes snapped open, while his remained blank. "You know holding it in isn't going to help you out Raven."

"Levi you're so goddamn noisy…" She pushed him away, standing up starting to pace.

"Well fucking spit it out then and I wouldn't be bugging you," He growled out, grasping her arm, stopping her from pacing.

"I can't have kids Levi. There are you fucking happy now?" She shoved him, turning away from him. "Damn it Levi…" She wrapped her arms around her stomach, feeling her throat start to close up.

She backed herself into the door, breathing deeply. He stared at her, reaching for her. He grabbed her into a hug, holding her tightly. "Why would you want them? More things to worry about.."

She pulled away from him, rubbing her hands together. "It doesn't matter, I'm quite tired can I-"

"We aren't finished yet," Levi muttered crossing his arms, staring at her. "You've been avoiding me."

Raven jerked her head towards him, "No I haven't. What gave you that thought? I've just been preparing for the new recruits like Erwin asked me to do. I told you that.. Did you really believe I was ignoring you like some child?" She moved sitting on the other bed. Levi watched her, sitting across from her on the other bed. "You act like one sometimes. Are you going to finally become a squad leader?"

"No, I'm not ready for that yet.. I do not act like a child Levi. Can we continue with another time, I'm tired and I could really just go to sleep." Raven yawned, while his face remained blank.

"Then sleep in here if your so tired," He replied, not taking his eyes off of her. "Hanji won't sleep and you'll hardly get sleep in there."

"Oh Levi you just want me near you now," Raven smirked trying to get him to smile. She had seen him smile a total of five times. In all of the years she's known him she had only witnessed it five times. He rolled his eyes at her. She smiled slightly glancing at her hands, "I don't think that it's a good idea, especially here in this facility. People will start to question you and you don't need that."

"Why the fuck does it matter Raven. You and I are the only one's that should be concerned with this, I'll decide what I need and don't need. Who gives a damn what they think Raven. We're adults," Levi stood up, going over to sit next to her.

"If you snore Levi, I'm leaving," She sighed, standing taking her hood off and letting her hair fall from the band that held it. She kicked off her shoes, setting them neatly beside the bed. Raven glanced over at Levi seeing him staring at her. "What are you looking at?"

"Tch you're so oblivious idiot," Levi turned taking off his cravat, then unbuttoning his shirt. Raven turned her face feeling hot, _Why am I blushing like a some shy girl?_ Raven cleared her throat taking off her jacket, usually she slept without her pants, but she didn't feel comfortable enough to do so. She pulled the blanket back, settling in feeling uncomfortable with her clothed legs. "I'll turn out the light then brat."

"Kay thanks grumpy," Raven yawned again turning so that she was laying away from him. She closed her eyes, trying to fade into dream world.

"Move over Brat," She felt a jab at her back. "That bed is filthy and I'm not going to sleep in it."

Raven turned seeing Levi shirtless while she moved over keeping enough space between them. "You were just sitting on it." She watched Levi, sliding underneath the cover's. "The bed feels different. It feels much softer than the one I have."

"Well I'm not going to lay in it, so shut up and go to sleep," Levi closed his eyes, his face starting to relax. She gazed at him for a few seconds, before she closed her own eyes, starting to drift off feeling warm arms surround her.


	6. Changes

_**Chapter 6**_

Raven was watching the Military Police glower at them, while she unchained Eren. She rolled her eyes, while she smiled at Eren. Eren raised an eyebrow at her grumbling stomach. "Hungry?"

"Only slightly," Raven didn't glance at the military police, instead she busied herself with the other chains.

"Rae!" She froze hearing Jozef's voice. She sent a look of panic to Eren, before she composed herself.

"I'm a bit busy at the moment, speak fast," Raven murmured, not bothering to turn around.

"What's got you all up tight Rae? You never used to be like this," Jozef moved so he was standing in her line of sight.

"I have things I have to get done, but it must be nice not to have to worry about having to get things done. So what made you decide to get up earlier than you usually do, to come bother me," Raven asked turning to look at him, seeing the rest of Levi's squad walking towards them.

She watched his face drop, before he masked what he was feeling. "Man… you've turned vicious. I think the Survey Corps is doing that to you, too much time outside the wall perhaps?"

"No I didn't turn vicious, I just don't care to listen to what the Military Police has to say about the job I do. Jozef, perhaps you shouldn't talk about what you don't know, you will never understand what it's like outside the wall, unless you have lived it," She muttered turning back to Eren. "Are you almost ready to go?"

"Rae, I didn't come here to fight-"He tried to defend himself.

"Then why are you here," She turned to glared up at the brown eyed man, before she realized that she was stooping to his level. "Enough, please. I don't judge you for the choices you made, so don't do that to me."

"Why am I here Raven? I'm here because I want a life with you, but you're to invested in your job to actually see that. So I'm just asking you Raven to think about it… please," He hissed, while stepping closer to her.

Raven took a step back, feeling slightly awkward. Yesterday was the first time they had seen each other in years and he was bringing this on her. "No. I don't want a life with you… maybe I did when we were younger, but not now or down the line. Sorry Jozef." She glanced away from his crestfallen face, "Eren, lets go."

Raven placed her hand on Eren's shoulder guiding them away, from the awkward scenario. She pushed him towards the squad, ignoring Eren's gaze on her face. "Eren… I'd like to introduce you to the rest of the Special Operations Squad. This is Petra Ral, Gunter Schulz, Auruo Bossard, and Erd Gin. This is Eren Yeager, I trust Levi filled you all in about him?" Raven questioned, watching each of them, nod.

"Tch… why are we all standing around?" Raven heard Levi's voice from behind her.

"Waiting on our late Captain," She grumbled moving towards her horse, ready to get the hell out of there. She sent one last glance towards Jozef, seeing him still staring after her. Raven looked away focusing on the rest of the squad, as they readied their horses. She wasn't going to allow herself to dwell on Jozef's words.

-.-

Raven wanted to be alone, so she rode ahead from the others. She glanced at all of the foliage around her, she hadn't been to the renovated castle in a while. It had been useless to them once Erwin had came into command. She smiled remembering when Benson, had fallen down the stairs when they did reside there.

Raven missed her friend dearly, she briefly wondered what he would've thought about a human that could turn into a Titan. She blinked a few times trying to clear the thoughts about her friend away. Instead she focused on how dirty the Castle would be, and how it was going to take hours to get the Castle up to Levi's standard.

Raven urged Mineral faster, when she saw the castle in sight. Raven jumped off Mineral, relishing in the memories. She had happy times here and she didn't want to forget them.

Raven looked up seeing the others, close by. She shrugged urging Mineral towards the stables. She took off the saddled, running her hand along the horse's back. "I'll have Eren give you some food." Raven patted Mineral's back one last time before leaving the stables.

She bit her lip hearing Petra reprimanding Auruo. He grinned up at her, "I made that rookie shake in his boots."

Raven held in her laugh at Petra's retort, "I'm guessing he was shocked cuz you're such a moron, Auruo."

She moved away from the bantering couple, going to stand next to Eren and his horse. "Are you okay?"

He jumped slightly, looking down instead of meeting her eyes. "Yes… Are you?"

"Of course, all I ask is what you heard to be kept to yourself," Raven tensed, reaching up to stroke the horse's face. "I hope Auruo didn't give you a hard time."

"No," Eren spit out quickly, before wincing slightly. "Sorry, it's just nerve wrecking to be around the best."

"We are people too Eren. Luck and the choices we make have a lot into play, on how we survive. I've seen many soldiers who've had better technique than myself, die by the hands of a Titan," Raven sighed seeing the others. She saw Levi glancing around with a disgusted look on his face. "Get ready, you're going to get to experience what it's like to be a part of Squad Levi."

Raven grinned, holding in a yawn as she made her way over to Levi. "Weeds everywhere… The place is a dump. It hasn't been used in ages, so the inside's probably covered with dust, too. That's a serious problem. Let's get started immediately." Levi glanced at Raven, while she looked around.

"You and I have a very different definition of serious problem," Raven smiled at him, heading towards the door. "But I get my own room, so I suppose that the serious problem isn't so bad."

-.-

Raven stretched going to find Levi. She walked into the room that he was cleaning. "Oh Captain! I've finished my floor, are you going to check my work?" Raven teased while she ran her fingers along the wood.

"Tch, shut up. Clean the room next to this one," Levi huffed, while he went back to dusting. Raven nodded, leaving the room bumping into Eren. She smiled at him, before leaving to the next room.

Raven swung open the door, seeing the wooden dresser placed by the window. She rushed forward opening the drawer, seeing Benson's initials carved in the drawer. Raven swallowed feeling her throat start to close up. She traced her fingers along it, wincing slightly feeling a splinter in her finger.

"Oi, brat you call this clean?" Raven turned seeing Levi standing in the doorway. Raven rolled her eyes messing with her finger. She heard him stomping into the room, pulling her arm until she was looking at him.

"Levi, I have a splinter, would you just hold on… What's with the attitude? Never mind that, what did I do wrong now?" Raven moved her arm from his grasp, trying to pull out the splinter.

"Why did you leave in the middle of the night," Levi confronted her while she raised an eyebrow at him.

"I didn't, I left early this morning. I went to get Eren out of the custody of the Military Police," Raven smiled when she managed to get the splinter out in one piece. "I tried not to wake you, I wanted you to get more sleep. Did you know you snore?"

He glared at her, when she mumbled out the last part. "I don't snore, you drool brat."

Raven rolled her eyes at him, trying not to grin. She lied about his snoring, she wanted to tell him that she had a good night sleep, it felt nice to be held and to be able to wake up next to someone, but they had both agreed that they couldn't let whatever they felt, they had a duty to do. She looked away from him, her heart sinking. She looked back at the carving, before she shut the drawer. "I don't drool Levi."

"Clean the damn room," Levi said dryly, while she put the mask around her mouth.

"Your wish is my command Captain…" Raven mumbled, catching his glare he sent at her.

-.-

Raven yawned, glancing down at the tea before her. "Erd… please tell me you didn't make the tea."

"No, Raven. Petra did," Erd bumped her while Raven smiled taking a sip. No matter what Erd did he always managed to mess up making tea. "We'll probably be kept on standby for another few days, but I heard there'll be a large expedition outside the wall in 30 day. And I hear we'll have to include the current crop of rookies," Erd announced, while Raven grew uncomfortable. Erwin had told her and Levi that they were not allowed to give details on the expedition.

"Is this true, Erd? That's awfully soon. The rookies are still feeling the effects of the most recent Titan attack…" Gunter expressed her worries, while she gulped down the rest of her tea.

"Those kids are probably petrified with fear," Auruo announced smugly, sipping his tea.

"Like how you were when you came across a Titan?" Raven asked, while Auruo choked on his tea.

"Is it true, Captain?" Petra asked Levi.

"I don't do operations planning. But knowing Erwin, he's probably thinking way ahead of us," Levi glanced at Raven, while she shrugged.

"That's true.. The situation's very different this time. The plan to retake Wall Maria which cost so many lives… is sent to the drawing boards. Now suddenly, another ray of hope appears," Erd glanced at Eren, while Eren shock played out on his face. "I still find it hard to believe. What's it like to become a Titan, Eren?"

Raven glanced at Levi, she knew that they weren't supposed to inquire this stuff from him, but she wondered if Levi would allow it. "My memories from that time aren't clear. Anyway, I lose track of myself. But self-mutilation is what set's it off. Like, if I take my hand like this…"

"You guys know the rules, don't you? We can't ask about anything more than what's in the report. Though I don't think _she'll_ remain quiet." Levi took a drink, staring at Eren blankly. "She might screw up while poking at you and you could end up dead."

Raven sent a well placed kick to Levi, only to blush when Erd grunted loudly in pain. He sent a glare towards her, while she avoided his eyes. "Don't mind the old man… She's quite good at what she does, no matter how annoying she can get," Raven assured Eren, trying to help ease the panic from his face.

Raven winced as she heard a loud thump at the door, followed by Hanji's grunt of pain. Petra got up quickly letting Hanij in. "Good evening, people of Squad Levi. How do you like your new castle home?"

"That didn't take long," Levi commented, glancing at Raven. They had made a bet of how long it would take for Hanji to come for Eren and she had lost, meaning that she now had to stay up, with Levi and help with all of his paperwork for a week.

"Damn it Hanji, you couldn't wait another hour," Raven hissed, rolling her eyes. She could feel her bed calling her name, but now it was ripped away because she had to do paperwork.

"Wild horses couldn't keep me away!" Hanji walked over to Eren.

"Squad Leader Hanji," Eren smiled at her.

"Thanks for waiting Eren! At the moment, I'm in charge of the experiments on two Titan's we captured alive. For tomorrow's experiment, I'd like your cooperation, Eren. I came to get permission," Hanji smiled down crazily at Eren.

"Did you say… experiment?" Eren whispered. "What would my role be?"

"Well now… The most exciting role, of course!" Hanji's face started to creep Eren out, because he moved away from her.

"I can't give you permission by myself… I don't have authority over what I can do," Eren's eyes darted to Levi.

"Levi! What's Eren's schedule tomorrow?" Hanji questioned, while Raven glanced down at her empty cup.

"Clearing the yard," Levi stated blankly.

"Good, then, It's set," Hanji smiled while Raven let out a small sigh. If Eren had to leave, it meant that one of them was going to have to pull out weeds, and Raven didn't mind cleaning, but she hated doing it outside.

Raven looked at Gunter, before standing. "I nominate Gunter to do it!" While Gunter sent her a death glare. Raven smiled at him, leaving the table heading to Levi's office. Raven turned hearing footsteps only to see Levi. "Don't make me clean outside Captain!"

Levi glared at her, before taking her arm and pushing her against the wall. "Quit it with the Captain brat."

"Someone's upset… You are my Captain aren't you," Raven asked, trying her hardest not to ruffle his feathers even more.

"You are my equal Raven, you know I hate it when you call me Captain," Levi rolled his eyes, moving away from her. "Damn, brat. You just get more annoying as the day passes on."

"Shame… here I thought you actually like me," She teased him, walking past him. "C'mon Levi, let's get the paperwork done so I can sleep."

-.-

"Alright, we finished and now I can sleep…" Raven trailed off stretching her arms, trying to hold in a yawn.

"You seemed to be in a heated debate with the man from earlier… What was that about?" Levi asked his voice seemingly not interested, but the way his gaze settled on her, she knew that he was curious.

"Old news. He used to be so kind, but I suppose we all changed." Raven stood, twisting popping her back, heading towards the door.

"I want you to stay with me," Levi announced while she faltered slightly. She turned raising her eyebrow at him. They had agreed that they couldn't let their feelings get anywhere and here he was going against the grain.

"Levi…" Raven started but he held up his hand.

"I know what I said Raven, I don't need you to tell me again." Levi sighed, getting up from his desk. "I liked having you in my bed."

Raven glanced down at the floor, seeking the scraps on the felt her face blush at his comment. She was almost thirty and here she was blushing. "Straight to the point huh?" Raven felt stuck, she liked waking up next to someone, but at the same time she wasn't a bed warmer. She weighed the pro's and con's before finally coming to a solution. "I like to cuddle, so I'll stay with you, but you have to cuddle with me. Deal?"

"Fine."


	7. Comfort

**_Hi lovelies!_**

 ** _It's been awhile but here's a new chapter! I hope you like it!_**

 ** _Forever and Always,_**

 ** _Ari._**

* * *

 _ **Chapter 7**_

Raven looked up hearing a knock at the door, only to see Mike and Hanji. She nodded in hello to them, before going back to the work in front of her. She was put in charge of helping the rookies, but from the route Erwin was planning it didn't seem possible that the rookies would be able to sit this one out like she had hoped.

"Don't tell me that you're planning a funeral for the two subjects Hanji.." Raven didn't look up at her crazy friend.

"Their bodies have already decomposed," Hanji's voice sounded sad at the thought. Raven rolled her eyes, trying to memorize the map. She knew that on the day of the new expedition, that she would be riding with Levi's squad as the extra back up for Eren.

"No that's not what we are here for," Mike's tone caused Raven to look up at her friend. "It's time Raven."

"Time for what?" She asked, although she had a pretty good idea of what he wanted.

"To step up. Become a Captain," Mike said leaning against the window.

Raven sighed heavily, she had this conversation many times before with them and still they would push. "No. Like I told you before I'm not a leader. I've never been a leader, I've never wanted to be one." They both held each other's gazes, neither one of them wanting to back down. "My friends… I'll tell you what. If I choose to become a Captain, you'll be the first to know. But for now, please respect my wishes."

Raven stood up gathering the map, heading towards the door leaving behind Hanji and Mike.

-.-

Raven glanced at the sun, using the trick her father had taught her with her hands. She sighed, seeing Levi approach.

"Assemble!" She watched Erd and Gunter rush towards Levi.

The two settled into their salutes, while Eren scrambled to put the horse feed down. She smiled slightly, leaning against the horse stalls listening to see if any of the information from Levi pertained to her.

"Get your things quickly! We're going out on reconnaissance," Levi announced to the two while Eren finally managed to make his way over to Levi.

"Good Morning, Captain Levi!" Eren saluted proudly while Raven found herself smirking.

"Let me be clear, Eren. Don't fall more than two lengths behind me. Don't forget that you're allowed to hang around because I'm watching you." Levi stated boredly, while he glanced at her. "Let's go!" The three scrambled going to get their things while Raven walked closer to Levi's horse stroking the animal. "Shouldn't you be getting your things?"

Raven whistled while Mineral came out of the stalls. She moved away from Levi's horse, giving her own some of her attention. "You told me this morning that it was a possibility that we could be going. Though I should be going with Erwin, since I am helping the recruits."

"Petra is going. I need your help with Eren," Levi glanced back at the three men scrambling around.

Raven moved, hauling herself on Mineral. "I don't think Eren would do anything drastic."

She maneuvered Mineral so that he was right beside Levi. "But I see your point." She tucked her hair behind her ear, looking up at the blue sky. "I don't think we will get many cadets. Our ranks are growing smaller."

"Tch regardless of those we get, we can't focus on that. Not now, our focus is on Eren and the reconnaissance," Levi turned to look at Eren still rushing around.

"Levi, what if I meet with you tomorrow. I'll ride with Petra and Auruo," Raven countered, stroking Mineral's mane.

"Tomorrow then," He nodded, while she urged Mineral back towards the stables. "Raven?" She looked back at him, seeing his blank face. "Sleep well."

She grinned slightly, "You too Levi."

-.-

"Petra!" Raven called, patting her horse one last time. "How did it go last night?"

Raven frowned when Petra looked down at the floor. "We didn't get many, but we got some."

She nodded, putting her hand on her shoulder. "That is better than none. Squad Leader Ness is showing them around, right?" Petra nodded, turning back to her own horse. "I need to introduce myself to the rookies, I'll be ready to go soon."

Raven spun around on her heel, aiming to find Ness. She found him on the other side of where she was standing, crying out for help. "Somebody, stop him!"

She laughed rushing towards his horse. She pulled the reins, so the horse wasn't teasing him. "Ness, are you alright?"

"Thank you Raven," He grumbled putting the white bandana back on. "Are you here for their training?"

"Yes," She nodded looking at the recruits briefly.

"I'll introduce you-" Ness started but she held up her hand.

"Allow me." She eyed each of them, frowning internally at their faces. From the look in their eyes she could see that they all had encountered a Titan and most likely lost friends. It was hard for her to describe the look, but to those who had seen the wrath of the Titans and lived through it, knew the look. "Raven Atwood, also known as the one who will help train you to not die. Squad Leader Ness is in charge of helping you memorize our strategies and I will help with combat. Most of you have experienced combat with Titans, but you have not experienced them outside the wall."

"Raven is not a Squad Leader, for reasons unknown to us all, but I expect to treat her as any higher up. She has survived this long and she has helped train many of our soldiers, including her own Captain," Ness stated setting his hand on her shoulder.

Raven nodded to Ness, biting her cheek, recognizing the two rookies standing in front. "I'll be back soon to help start with your training for outside the wall. But as for right now, your main priority is memorizing."

"You are leaving," Ness questioned eyeing something behind her.

"Simple recon," She shrugged, catching Thomas's brown eyes. "I should be back soon."

"Can they ask you a few questions before you go," Ness patted his horse, glancing back at the rookies.

"A few," Raven nodded, turning to see Petra with her horse. She held up her hand, looking back at the rookies. "State your name, then your question. It will help me remember your name."

Ness pointed to a boy with all of his hair shaved off. "Connie Springer! Are you Captain Levi's Second in Command."

"Yes."

"And you helped train him?" His grey eyes widened.

Raven couldn't help but laugh slightly. "I did partake in some of his training. At the time I was apart of Commander Erwin's Squad. Yet most of the credit goes to Levi himself."

"Jean Kirschtein, did you really come from the underground like Captain Levi," Raven stared at the taller boy.

"Yes." She answered simply staring back at Petra when she came to stand next to her. "I'm afraid that is all the time I have for questions." She smiled at Thomas, nodding her head to him.

-.-

"How did it go," Raven got down from her horse, looking at Levi. She watched the others gather around Eren, looking over the plans for the expedition.

Levi looked at Eren, before turning back to his horse. "He did was supposed to do. How was your introduction?"

"It went well. There aren't many, but it's better than none and the boy who helped me when I had my encounter with the Titan joined the Corps," She moved to stroke Mineral.

"How did you sleep," He questioned, looking back at the others.

"Fitfully. Seems like I got used to the snores," Raven teased, laughing at his glare. "How did you sleep?"

"Better, I didn't have drool on my shoulder," Levi grumbled, letting his horse lick his fingers.

She continued laughing, "If that is the case, then there is an extra bed in Petra's room." He rolled his eyes, focusing on his horse. "Joking matters aside, Eren's friends joined the Corps. Are we allowed to disclose that information to him?"

"Not yet." Levi sighed rubbing his eyes. "We will head back soon."

Raven nodded setting a food bar in his hand, before heading towards the others. "Is Eren caught up?" He stood quickly, saluting her. "Relax Eren," She smiled setting her hand on his shoulder. "You almost have me whiplash." She held out a bar to him, passing the rest out to the others.

"Yes, he's caught up," Eld stated ripping into the bar. She looked up at the darkening sky. "Is it almost time to head back?"

Raven nodded, sitting beside Eren. She watched the others tense, looking at Eren wearily. "It was a nice day today," She commented looking up at the sky, loving the feeling of warmth radiating from the sun.

"It's time to head back," Levi announced, on top of his horse.

-.-

Raven listened to Eren's friend fuss over him, while she checked his body for injuries. She giggled when Mikasa threatened Levi. "Tch, not funny brat."

She walked beside Levi, trying to silence her laughs. "You're going to have to sleep with one eye open." Levi rolled his eyes, brushing his horse. Raven looked down at the ground, "I'll talk to you later tonight."

She turned from him heading towards the pond that was on the side of the castle. She sat beside the tree that overlooked the pond. Raven moved again, pulling out an emblem. She set the emblem against the tree, pulling out a small piece of bread and meat. She tore it in half, setting the other part against the emblem.

"Happy Birthday Benson," She murmured, looking up at the pink sky.

 _*Flashback*_

 _Raven looked around, seeing Benson sitting by the old tree. She clutched the bread and the piece of meat tighter in her hands, walking over to him._

" _I told you I wanted to be alone," He sighed, when she sat beside him._

" _I know.. I know, just hear me out okay?" Raven started, thrusting the two food items into his hands. "It's not much, but I just wanted to say Happy Birthday and I hope that you have many more."_

 _She smiled at him before she stood to take her leave. "Raven… Wait!" He reached out holding onto her arm, pulling her back down. "I don't really want to be alone." He split the bread in half offering it to her._

" _It's yours," She shook her head, pushing his hand away._

 _He rolled his eyes, "It's my birthday and I want to share. Take the bread Rae Rae." She chuckled, taking the piece. "I miss my mom and my little brother. When it was our Birthday, she would make us breakfast and smother our faces with kisses. I can't wait to continue a tradition like that with my own family."_

 _Raven grinned at him, savoring the warm bread. "That sounds so sweet Benson."_

" _What about you?" He bit into the piece of meat._

" _I didn't really celebrate birthdays that much. My family would be nicer to each other on someone's birthday," Raven smiled slightly._

" _Really? When you have kids, are you going to celebrate," Benson questioned, with his mouthful._

" _Really. I can't have children," Raven grimaced at the grass, feeling her heart drop at the thought. "But if I could, I would."_

" _I'm sorry," He set his hand on her shoulder._

" _Don't apologize, it happens," She pushed away her sadness, bumping his shoulder. "Besides you and I both know, that I'll get to spoil your future kids, because I would be their Aunt. Rose declared as much."_

 _Benson rolled his eyes shoving her away. "What makes you think I'll marry Rose?"_

" _She's obsessed with you and she may or may not have said she want's to have your babies," Raven laughed, rushing to moved away when he got up starting to chase her._

" _You are so dead Atwood!"_

 _*End of Flashback*_

Raven could feel a huge weight settle in her chest. She wished that he would've lived, but the world they lived in was cruel.

"I miss you my friend," She whispered, leaning back against the tree. "You were supposed to live and make me an Aunt." She smirked slightly when her thoughts switched to Eren. "You would have a heart attack if you knew that kids were changing into Titan forms." Raven leaned towards the pond, making small ripples in the water. "I spoke to your mom and brother a few days ago. Man, your brother's getting so big, he's making me feel old." She bit her lip, running her fingers through her hair. "He want's to join the cadets, but I couldn't let him. I made him promise that he wouldn't. I know that you wouldn't approve." She laughed ruefully, feeling tears start to gather in her eyes. She brushed her hand across her checking making sure no tears fell. She sighed when she heard the dinner bells. "I should go. Goodbye my friend."

Raven stood up, clutching the emblem setting in back into her pocket.

-.-

Raven sat on the bed, brushing her hair when Levi walked in. "You weren't at dinner," He stated, pulling his boots off.

"No, I wasn't feeling too hungry," She sighed setting her brush back into the drawer. She stood up walking over to him, taking his cravat off. His fingers wrapped around her wrists holding them still. "What's wrong?"

"You tell me," Raven tried to move away, but he held onto her his face carefully blank. "Raven."

She bit her lip, pulling the emblem out of her pocket. "It's Benson's birthday today. It.." Her voice cracked slightly, before she tried stepping away again. She cleared her throat, looking down at her hands. "It was a little harder this evening."

He let her go without a word, moving to get undressed and ready for bed. She looked away from him, moving towards her box that she kept under the floorboards. She moved the boards away grasping the heavy box, she opened it seeing all of the emblems of her friends and comrades that she had lost.

She set it back into the box, biting her cheek harshly, to keep her emotions in check. Once the box was safely tucked away, she moved towards the bed laying underneath the covers.

A few minutes later Levi got underneath the covers beside her, pulling her so that she was pressed up against him. He moved his hand so that he was stroking her hair, she closed her eyes pushing her face into his chest. "I promise I won't drool."

He chuckled softly, pressing his lips against her forehead. "I promise that I'll snore." She laughed, tracing shapes into his chest. "I'm not good at comforting, but I'm here Raven. You don't always have to be strong around me."

She smiled, leaning up to give him a brief kiss before she settled back against him. She intertwined their hands, "Just you being here with me is comforting."


End file.
